For better than six years now I have looked forward to every other Tuesday and chatting with all my dear friends and my sisters here at Murder She Writes. We’ve been through some rough times and all of you were patient through my recovery and the resurrection of my writing career. We’ve also shared some wonderful times. You’ve gone through every step of the reno on this old house with me and my husband as well as my baby girl’s wedding. I will cherish the memories until the end of my days.It is with a heavy heart that I say goodbye today. Of course I’ll be on Facebook and Twitter and at www.thefacesofevil.com and I hope you’ll say hello from time to time. I’m streamlining and organizing my time so that I can have more of it for me. Sounds a little selfish, I know. But I have avoided me for a very long time. Let’s face it, as wives and mothers it’s simply easier to focus on and to take care of everyone else. I’ve done this for most of my life. Taking care of others and ignoring me became a habit early on. What’s wrong with that, right? The world needs all the martyrs it can get.
There’s just one problem with that way of thinking—I realized recently that I’m not a martyr at all. What I am is a chicken. Yes, that’s right, a straight up chicken. It takes real courage to focus on and fix yourself. And you don’t have to worry about feeling guilty when you’re busy taking care of everyone else. It’s much harder to say, “Sorry, I can’t do that because I’m going to get a pedicure or taking a nice, leisurely walk.” Or, “I’m going to the gym.” I’ve always hated telling anyone no, but I’m exercising that muscle starting now. A wonderful lady and dear friend of mine from childhood said it best, “Fifty-five and coming alive!” So maybe I’m having a delayed midlife crisis. Whatever. As long as it helps me get where I’m going, game on!
Where am I headed? Well, I didn’t need a GPS to figure that out. All I needed was a few months of reflection and a long, hard look at myself in the mirror. I’m shedding all those extra pounds and getting strong. I’m spending time with my husband and taking leisurely Sunday drives. I’m considering what I want before I factor in what everyone else wants. I’m going to enjoy some time just being me.
I love all you guys and look forward to showing off pics of my courageous journey into Me-Town. While you’re here today, why not share what you’ve done for you lately?
I can not tell you how sad I am to see Deb leave. I met her for the first time at the 2006 Atlanta RWA conference and we had dinner with her friends — she is kind, gracious, sweet, and Southern in all the best ways. The accident that befell her should never have happened, she should never have had to suffer through the pain and frustration of the past two-and-a-half years. She is truly an inspiration to me, and to everyone lucky enough to call her friend. I understand your decision, Deb — I support you totally — but we’re all going to miss you. XOXO. ~Allison