For those of you who sail, you know that term.
It’s why I’ve been MIA.
It’s not that I don’t love ya’all. I do. Truly, madly, deeply. But the reality is, when I sold my first book, I sold two more within the same month, and kept selling. I was overwhelmed by the prospect of deadlines and took a leave of absence from my business, a referral agency, that I started from the ground up nearly 27 years ago. I blissfully skipped away leaving the entire business in the hands of my capable office manager and wistfully wrote ‘till my heart’s content.
Fast forward seven years. Between the economy and my lack of involvement, my business hit critical mass last month. I had a choice: revive it, which meant jumping in feet first, 100% committed and reboot and rebuild or walk away. I chose the former. I could no more walk away from my long standing clients and my loyal contractors than I could say adios to my writing and my readers.
Since the first of the year I have done nothing but immerse myself 100% back into my company. In many ways, I am starting up an entire new and vastly improved company. It’s been grueling.
Writing? What’s that? FB? Huh? Responding to email? In your dreams.
Despite all of the mind melting brain farts and tension headaches, I’m loving the process of resurrecting my once thriving company. The determination, the focus, and the challenge of landing hesitant clients has infused me with an energy and, yes, a cockiness ^_~, I have not felt for a long time. I feel like there is absolutely nothing I can’t accomplish. And as much as it has taken way from my writing time and my beloved writing community, it was what I needed.
I realize now I was burning out. I have been chasing one deadline after another for 7 straight years, and while deadlines mean contracted books which equal a healthy bank account, I was tiring. I still have two contracted books to turn in, one by mid-February and the other by the end of May, but now I feel revitalized and confident they will be fresh.
I’m still going to be running my agency, with the help of my daughter who I am so very happy have by my side, but I will also be able to tackle my writing with fresh eyes and revitalized gray matter (what’s left of it that is).
I’m very happy in my crazy, chaotic world. It’s how I roll. ^_^
How about you? Do you like to ride the ragged edge or are you a smooth sailor?