Hi all, I’m late posting this as I’m feeling a bit under the weather. Since I’m a little fuzzy today, I’m going to do a Random Thoughts Blog. Come on in, and I’ll tell you what is on my mind—in a random way.
Last week in Cambridge, Mass., a radio talk show host was charged in his wife’s murder, allegedly spiking her Gatorade with anti-freeze. The motive is thought to possibly be the fact that the talk show host was broke and his wife had a $250,000.00 life insurance policy. If this is true…Dude, what were you thinking? Don’t you watch Law and Order? CSI? Court TV? Sheesh.
And speaking of CSI, I saw a real Crime Scene Technician at a workshop recently (the kind who wears comfortable clothes, flat shoes and no gun), and she talked about how juries are influenced by the TV show CSI. Which is troubling since the TV show is FICTION. But juries are now expecting bombshell type of evidence to prove the guilt of the defendant. In many cases, it’s either not possible because the TV show CSI is FICTION, takes too long or is too expensive when they already have a solid case against the defendant.
Which brings me to another thought—do people who plan and kill really think they are going to get away with it? What kind of thought process makes them believe that? Scott Peterson is an interesting example. We don’t really know if he planned it, or did it in the heat of the moment then covered it up. But he seemed so convinced he’d get away with it. Again, Dude, what were you thinking? If I wrote that scene, I wouldn’t have established the killer’s alibi in the same place the killer dumped the body. Duh.
Now let’s switch gears and talk about me 🙂 I finished the first draft of my book last week. I met my goal. Which gave me about three minutes of relief before something really weird happened. In my head the goal shifted. Suddenly, I’m thinking, but the book is really weak, needs at least three more scenes, a stronger black moment, and I haven’t written the wrap up yet .The mystery has problems, the clues aren’t consistent and I’ve dropped a couple threads. Then I’m bashing myself for not doing the first draft well enough….
Hello! I never meant for the first draft to be good. All I wanted to do is lay down the story. I am better at rewriting than blank-page writing. So what has happened here? It’s a subtle sabotage that I do to myself. I let the goal shift in my head so that before I realize it, I’m not quite measuring up. I’m not good enough. It’s probably a form of fear at work. I am teaching myself to recognize it and stop it. Writing is hard enough without indulging in self-sabotage.
I’m gong to end my random thoughts here and leave you with these closing thoughts:
Don’t try murder in real life, you probably won’t get away with it.
Stomp out all forms of self-sabotage.
Celebrate your successes.
Don’t try to write a blog while sick 🙂
Hope you all have a happy and healthy Monday!