I don’t have a dog. I don’t have a cute cat. No horses, sheep, goats. The gerbil disappeared down the heat vent and we haven’t seen her in over a decade. I don’t even want to think about where that snake went. The wheel still turns but the hamster died.
And, really, you wouldn’t want me to have a pet.
As you may already suspect, I sorta have a bad luck with our furred and/or feathered friends. But, I come by it naturally. It all started with the “Problem with the Parakeets.”
You see, when I was young I had several parakeets which I left in my mother’s care while I went off somewhere—I don’t remember exactly where, but it was for a week or two. Anyway, my mother didn’t understand than when the birds ate the seed, they left the shells. So, it still looked like they had food when…they didn’t.
We had a lovely ceremonial burial for them in the backyard. I still haven’t fully recovered.
Since then, I’ve resisted pet ownership, occasionally succumbing, but with less than stellar results. So, now, in a pet infested world, I am the worst anomaly… a non-pet person. It’s not that I don’t like animals. I do, I really do. But to me pets are like babies… somewhat overwhelming and my life has moved on. I’m the gal with my passport in my pocket and my bag packed.
So, no pooch for me. (I almost said no pussy either, but I just couldn’t… not with a straight face.)
Anyway, apparently this lack of a pet really puts me behind the eight ball when it comes to FaceBook and all this social media promotion stuff. I’ve read one testament after another stating that posts with pictures of author’s pets get the most “likes.”
I’m so screwed.
How am I going to get anyone to read my posts if I don’t have a cute kitty picture?
Never one to be defeated by defeat, I asked myself “What would Lucky do?”
Well, she’d lie, of course.
So, I decided I would “borrow” other people’s pets for my posts.
The neighbors walk their dogs twice a day. All I needed was a camera, right? No problemo. Just had to break out the old iPhone. So, one morning I went to snap some candids in the park. I thought it was a good idea too…until the police stopped me and started asking questions. They were pretty nice. I got off with a warning.
Okay, time to retrench.
I thought about just getting some stock photos from some website, but they never use the same animal. So, if someone asked me for more photos, I’d be in trouble. Pretty soon someone would ferret out the truth☺
Here’s my new plan: I want you to tell me “If Lucky had a pet (besides the foul-mouthed Macaw she already has), what kind of pet would she have?”
Or, tell your best pet story….I know you have one:)
My mother tells me I was born a very long time ago, but I’m not so sure—my mother can’t be trusted. These things I do know: I was raised in Texas on barbeque, Mexican food and beer. I currently reside in Las Vegas, where my friends assure me I cannot get into too much trouble. Silly people. I am the author of WANNA GET LUCKY? (A NY Times Notable Crime Novel for 2010 and double RITA™ Finalist), LUCKY STIFF, SO DAMN LUCKY and two digital novellas, LUCKY IN LOVE and LUCKY BANG. My upcoming releases are tow digital novellas, LUCKY NOW AND THEN, Parts One and Two (March and April 2013) and the fourth Lucky novel, LUCKY BASTARD (May 14th in hardcover). I can usually be found at the bar, but also at www.deborahcoonts.com.
Oh man, those poor parakeets. I’m not a huge fan of pet birds, but I wouldn’t wish that on them.
I love having pets. Whenever I don’t have one, my life feels kinda incomplete. Right now, I have two cats – Kira (the Queen) and Max (or Hairy Maxie Drooly Face). Kira rules the house and Max – who’s an abused stray we adopted – rules the garage. She lays around barking at the birds and eating. He recently took out a squirrel that had wandered into his domain.
I love my cats. And now I want a dog. But the felines would revolt if I tried to bring a pooch into the mix.
I just can’t seem to become responsible enough to take care of a pet….
And I’m gone so much of time, it wouldn’t be fair. Although, the pets might receive better care while I’m gone:)
We used to have quite a menagerie–cats, hamsters, fish, turtles, lizards. It has dwindled down to one kitty, who does not care to have her picture made for FB or anywhere else. Sometimes I snap her when she’s not looking.
When I had pets in the past, I sorta felt like a boat owner does: two happiest days are they day you acquire them and they day they move on:) Harsh, I know….I love other people’s pet, though! I just end up resenting my own.
I would lend you one or two of mine when they are being exceptionally bad =)
I have all rescue animals.. ones that were abandoned or hurt to the point the owners were going to put them down due to cost to fix them. I have the owners sign them over to me, I fix them with the intention of finding homes for them. Yeah well there are now 3 such cats at my house.
Two had broken legs that healed with surgery. The third one came in having been found on the streets carrying a front leg. The leg had a rubber band on it that had cut off the circulation to the lower part of the leg… I had to amputate it. Now Zippy is 3 leg, but do not tell him he is disabled or handicapped!
Maybe what Lucky needs is to “friend” an alley cat.
I think there is a special place in Hell for people who abuse animals. I think you’re absolutely right, Lucky needs a rescue animal! Great idea!
I think Lucky would have a cat. I can’t see her walking a dog. A cat would give her some freedom and still come cuddle with her at night.
Cats–if you have the right one, they are great. My son an daughter-in-law had seven they were taking care of at one point. I never really learned much about cats until that adventure. They have such distinct personalities. There was one named Frizzle….I still miss that little guy:)
I agree with Toni. A cat and the Macaw … wow, it would be a zoo! Maybe the cat belongs to a victim, and Lucky brings it to live with her, and it has attitude … I could see Lucky having a temporary pet, like the dog of her neighbor and she forgets to let it out, or feeds it part of her steak and it gets sick, or it’s ugly as sin but has a sweet disposition. Or it’s stubborn and refuses to walk. It would be an added complication as she’s trying to solve whatever case she’s on.
I like pets in books when they fit. Lucy and Sean now have a cat that they acquired in SILENCED when they discovered the victim had a cat and Lucy didn’t want it to go to the pound. She was going to keep it just until they contacted the victim’s family, but ended up keeping the cat (who also provided a clue!) … but now, I have to deal with the cat and moving it to San Antonio, or leaving it with Lucy’s sister-in-law in DC. Decisions, decisions …
I know–when Lucky moved into the hotel I had to figure out what to do with the frigin’ bird…so, I moved him to her office where he keeps her staff on the brink of mutiny:)
Now Lucky’s moving back into her apartment….no, I won’t tell you why:) so, there’s a possibility for more pets–I think I’ll leave the bird where he is though, too fun to have a foul-mouthed bird in a Customer Relations office:)
I love our three Springer Spaniels but sometimes I dream of having a house without dog hair or muddy foot tracks. Of course I’d have to get rid of my husband as well, so I might as well keep them all. 🙂
I loved your story about the pets. That’s what I think Lucky should have, pet problems like you. Then when she meets a dog or cat, both would of course have an attitude, then the animal will teach her. 🙂
Pet problems….I’ve had so many:) Not sure I’ve learned anything from them other than to fight my urge to get a pet…
I agree Lucky needs some responsibility–she’s getting a bit self-absorbed for my tastes:)
When the siblings and I were kids, we were constantly asking the parents for a pet (usually a dog), but my mum– being the prescient woman that she is– always said that she’d end up being the one caring for it, so that when she wanted a pet, she’d (we’d) get one. It also didn’t help that we moved every few years… constantly pulling up stakes with three children is tough enough, but adding a pet to the mix? *shudder*
I did, however, catch a gecko-like lizard (they’re ubiquitous on the Iberian peninsula– if you’ve ever been there you know which ones I’m talking about) once and kept it hidden in a box in a drawer in my room. Needless to say, it escaped and made its merry way to the parents’ washroom, where it met its untimely demise. Did I mention my mum’s not a fan of geckos? 🙂
Then there was the time that my parents were in Taiwan and my younger sister acquired a gerbil. It lasted until about two seconds after the parents returned and was then promptly given away.
But now that they’ve (mostly permanently) settled, they have a ridiculously cute bichon frise who rules the roost.
Hmm, Lucky’s a Vegas girl, so something exotic would be most excellent. I’m thinking capuchin monkey, though I really want to saw snow leopard or something 😛
In the book I’m writing now, Lucky does have an interesting experience with a couple of snow white tiger cubs:) But, alas, they belong to Siegfried and Roy, so she has to return them.
Lucky is so busy, I can’t think of any pet that is that low maintenance. Lots of people think cats are loners, but it’s not really true. When I’m home mine (3) are always out with me in the same room instead of on the bed where they spend most of the day.
that’s the problem with pets! They need so much attention….and Lucky is the one seeking attention–might be tough for her:)
So who is the dog is in the picture??
We just paid $300 to have our dog boarded and groomed while we were on vacation. That’s the downside of dogs. For the cats, I put out a big bowl of food and they have multiple litter boxes in the garage which they access through the cat door. I had a neighbor girl come check the food a few times. Cats are soooo easy.
I know! I love the picture!
That is Nubble. He belonged to a very great friend of mine, Pierre O’Rourke, a fab media host in Phoenix (if you’re down there promoting, give him a call!–boy can he make running around town soooo much easier. You’ll get a great new friend in the process. We’ve known each other forever.)
Nubble adopted Pierre and they were inseparable until Nubble moved on to the next adventure. We all miss him–he was a fabulous dog, as the photos attest:)
I could see Lucky with a big ugly fish that just stared at her each time she comes home. Something with really big eyes that caused more of that wonderfully brief and funny self reflection she’s so fond of doing.
See yourself in the fish’s eyes:) Now there’s a scary thought:) Like the thing is look at her wondering whether to filet her or just throw her on the grill whole…..
I see Lucky with a beautifully groomed Afgan!