At least that’s what my profile test on How to Facsinate.com indicates. And, I wanted you to be the first know, in case you were wondering and all.
I’m also not MENSA material, my best colors are warm and strong, I am not suffering from Parkinson’s, although Alzheimer’s is a possibility (or it could be simply too many birthdays), my personality is a bit too brash, I’m a bit of a perfectionist, my future is murky, and my perfect man does not exist. I know my BMI, and the ideal weight for my height, how to eat for my body-type, the most flattering haircut for the shape of my face, and the right tint for my lips. I know what styles to wear and which accentuate my physical imperfections.
Where did I learn all of this? From those silly tests that pop up on my browser homepage. You see, I take them all. Well, not ALL of them. I resisted the Lose Ten Pounds in Two Hours thing— even I know that would require a chainsaw and the sacrifice of a body part.
Oh, and the How to Get a Man in Ten Easy Steps, I resisted that one, too. For one thing, I don’t really want a man. And ten steps? Please.
Now, if they had a test to see what you should do with a man once you had him, I could go for that. Oh, and while I’m dreaming, how about a test that would show me how to increase my height so that it was perfect for my weight? I mean, if these test people want to be really helpful…
But, falling easy prey to these ten-questions-to-unlock-the-secrets-of-the-Universe tests does worry me a bit. Clearly I have a Pavlovian response to accept almost any opportunity to distill a complex, convoluted concept to its illogical simplicity, rendering it virtually useless.
Maybe it’s self-preservation. At my age when even simple math is beginning to elude me, distilling things down to manageable parts is crucial if I am to continue dealing effectively with the world—assuming I deal with it effectively now, which is not all that clear.
Maybe I’m just tired. I’ve read that humans are not wired to handle the information overload of modern life. No kidding. I find leaving my smartphone at home is increasing attractive. I switch off the news—in fact, I can’t name one national news anchor. I don’t read the newspapers (Are there even printed papers anymore? I don’t know.) Apparently I’m turning into my mother (Now there’s a topic for another day). But, drowning as I am in the river of information, I find learning-made-easy has some appeal.
Maybe I’m just delusional, longing for answers in a world that is increasingly confusing. And, I know easy answers aren’t answers at all, but somehow applying order to disorder, even if it’s not that valid, makes me feel better…at least for a moment.
Maybe I’m just simple-minded. Maybe I just want to see where I fit.
Maybe there’s a test that will tell me why I take endless tests.
God, I need a twelve-step program….
Maybe, just maybe, I’m trying to learn something about myself.
Take this whole www.howtofascinate.com.
Truly, I’m wise enough to understand that “fascinating” is probably a bit beyond my reach. But, that’s not what the site is really about. No, it actually is designed (quite cleverly) to teach you how you communicate, where your strengths and weaknesses are, and how to improve them to improve your communication skills. It’s pretty cool.
And that damned test pegged me coming and going. A trendsetter…a rebel who looks for validation from others, but who could care less about engendering trust. Allrighty then…not pretty but it’s a place to start.
Running into myself has been quite the learning experience…fascinating, in fact. And it does beg the question: shouldn’t I know this stuff about myself by now? After all, I’ve been keeping me company for decades so you’d think I would’ve figured this stuff out. Apparently, I still have a lot to learn. And more tests to take.
Are you still learning things about yourself? If so, what? And how did you discover these little gems?