 | 24 Mar 10 |
Anyone with children is familiar with that phrase.
What astounds me is the number of…adults I hear using that lament. As much as I love hanging with writers in person and online, sometimes in group situations, or even one on one situations, there tends to be focus on the negative in this industry. Everything from — “Can you believe so-and-so got another 3 book deal? That last book sucked!” To — “I heard he/she’s a year late with the manuscript, how come they keep issuing him/her contracts? The books aren’t even that great.” And lastly — “Did you see what she/he said on so-and-so’s blog/review site/yahoo group? What a Prima Donna. That will lose her/him fans for sure and they deserve it.”
Sound familiar?
I hope not.
That said, I’m not blameless. I like being “in the know” and I have those “It’s Not Fair” feelings sometimes, but mostly, I suck it up and move on. Mostly, I’m happy for people who are even moderately successful in this crazy business, even if they’re not my bestest buddy. That’s probably another reason why I don’t publicly review books, not on good reads, not on shelfari, not on any of the book vendor sites. I have my opinion. Ask me and I’ll usually share it with you. But to slam a book, or worse, to rate it poorly because of the “It’s Not Fair” attitude seems…petty, mean and shortsighted. How many of us have had another writer pen a poor review of our book? Or even worse for me, a mediocre review? How hard is it when you thought that person was your friend? Too much politics and second guessing for me, so I skip it entirely. Maybe it smacks of the ostrich mentality, but hey, it works for me.
So today, let’s revert to our inner six-year-old and share what you think is unfair (funny please, no political views!) I’ll throw in a prize — any title of the Lorelei James backlist, either in print or download form!
1) It’s unfair I have to use wrinkle cream AND zit cream on the same day
2) It’s unfair I spent $11 washing my car and it rained TWO hours later
3) It’s unfair my hair looks awesome the day I’m going to the salon to get it cut and highlighted
4) It’s unfair I sat next to the little girl being tested for swine flu at the lab when I was waiting for blood work
5) It’s unfair that some people can write a bajillion words a day on their WIP and I struggle with typing “Chapter One”
6) It’s unfair that I have turkeys all over my yard and have to listen to them mating 24/7
***added*** It’s not fair that Facebook DELETED the Lorelei James account yesterday because they think I don’t exist and I was spamming people, when in actuality, we were trying to get my friends to move to a Lorelei James Fan Page — argh — so now I’m forced to try and convince them, yes, I really do exist, but Lorelei James is a pen name and I’m not a spammer!!***
READY, SET, GO!!!
© 2010, Lori G. Armstrong. All rights reserved.
Lori G. Armstrong left the firearms industry in 2000. Her first mystery novel, BLOOD TIES, published in 2005, was nominated in 2006 for a Shamus Award for Best First Novel by the Private Eye Writers of America. The second book in the Julie Collins mystery series, HALLOWED GROUND, released Nov. 2006, was nominated for a 2007 Shamus Award for Best Paperback Original, a Daphne du Maurier Award and won the 2007 WILLA Cather Literary Award for Best Original Softcover Fiction. SHALLOW GRAVE, released in Nov. 2007, was nominated for a 2008 High Plains Book Award, a Daphne du Maurier Award and was a finalist for the 2008 WILLA Cather Literary Award. The fourth book, SNOW BLIND, released in Oct. 2008, won the 2009 Shamus Award, from the Private Eye Writers of America, for Best Paperback Original. Lori is a proud fourth generation South Dakotan and lives in Rapid City with her family.
Subscribe to Posts 
[...] It’s Not Fair Blog Post [...]
by Lori Armstrong » Blog Archive » It’s Not Fair March 24th, 2010 at 8:10 amIt’s not fair that you can’t think of a “it’s not fair” contest entry and you really realy want that book…..
by Cheryle Sholey March 24th, 2010 at 8:32 amYou’re entered anyway, Cheryle!
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:45 amIt’s not fair that I didn’t know Lorelei James was also Lori Armstrong…can’t wait to start those books
by Sherri Bergschneider March 24th, 2010 at 11:17 amWell, Sherri, I glad you stumbled across my alter ego — the books are night and day different — hence the two names
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 12:01 pmIt’s unfair that my waist measurement now rivals my bust measurement. Shouldn’t growth be proportional?
by Tove Bormes March 24th, 2010 at 8:22 amTove! I hear ya. When you coming to Rapid so we can whine over beer, live and in person?
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:46 amFriday. how’s that for prompt attention! Sorry I haven’t written sooner. It’s been a strange week. I’ll tell you all about it later this week. I’m anticipating two appointments – one Fri eve, and one Saturday sometime. I’m loving Fri night, if you’re free.
by Tove Bormes March 24th, 2010 at 7:57 pmIt’s unfair that had to sit through 2 hours of Miley Cyrus “mentoring” people who are not only older than her, but vastly more talented, on American Idol last night because I recap the episodes on my blog (a task that is entirely self-imposed). wah wah wah
by Kathleen Taylor March 24th, 2010 at 8:23 amKathy, just another reason for me not to watch AI – I know you’ve been an addict since the first season.
But I will admit…I do like the Hannah Montana show — I won’t seek it out, but if the Disney channel is on…I will watch an episode or two
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:48 amIt’s unfair that in my head I’m around 30 but I look my age (68). And, people expect my fiction to sound as if it was written by an old lady.
by Carol Shenold March 24th, 2010 at 8:49 amAnd Carol can I just say THANK YOU for not writing your age? It drives me insane when I pick up a book and I know the author is a “woman of age” simply by the style of language she uses – so girl, you’re head and shoulders above your 30-something peers!
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:49 amIt’s unfair that I eat less and the scales don’t show less!!!!
by Debra Webb March 24th, 2010 at 9:01 amThat is unfair Debra, but I imagine you feel better? Not smoking and moving that body some? You’re probably putting on muscle, which weighs more
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:50 am[...] And if you’re so inclined to leave a comment on my post over at Murder She Writes, I’m giving away a copy of any of my Lorelei James backlist, print or download, to a random commenter. Here’s the link:Â It’s Not Fair [...]
by LoreleiJames.com » Blog Archive » Whining Wednesday March 24th, 2010 at 9:13 amI wonder how those “pingback” things worked. Huh.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:50 amIt’s not fair that I might have to go back to the doc for a 2nd round of antibiotics to shake this bug when I take my vitamins and eat my vegetables.
Should this be done kicking and flailing? I think so. Wah, no fair!
by Charlene Teglia March 24th, 2010 at 9:25 amYes, Charli, kicking and flailing your arms, and if you can get away with it, lying on the floor and beating your fists into it!
Sorry you’re not feeling better. The girls first couple years of school were hard on all of us because they caught every bug coming down the pike, no matter what we did.
If I get a sinus infection I have to be on antibiotics for a solid month before it improves – (((hugs to you and the fam))))
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:52 amIt’s not fair that I had to wake up to a foot of snow — and then had to shovel it before I could start my day. I want to go back to bed now!
by Becky LeJeune March 24th, 2010 at 9:27 amI had to scrape my car windows this morning, Becky. And it was 70 on Monday.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:53 amIt is unfair that I am working my butt off and have applied to over 250 jobs and still don’t have one but others apply to one job and get it!
It is unfair that b/c 1 person on my husband’s project team didn’t do their job, he now can’t come on vacation with us.
It is unfair that my mother’s boobs are more perky than mine and she is 31 years older than me!
Whew! That feels better!
by Aly March 24th, 2010 at 9:34 amOkay, Aly, you’re winning the Unfair contest so far…I hope the job situation improves and your hubby is eventually recognized for his work ethic…
I’ve got no advice for the perky boobs, since my droop…
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:54 amIt’s unfair that when you finally have the time to do the things you wanted to do, you’re too old to do most of them. Or at least too old to do them and not injure something.
by Terry Odell March 24th, 2010 at 9:36 amHmm…me wonders what dangerous things you want to do, Terry
Snowboarding? Rock climbing? Now that you’re in the Rockies
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:55 amIt’s unfair that you suddenly lose 2 lbs and now your best slacks fit perfectly the day AFTER the party (where you ran into your ex) instead of before. Cruel, cruel fate!
by MaryChris March 24th, 2010 at 9:46 amMaryChris, I’m sure you looked good anyway!
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:55 amIt’s not fair that I have to stop and get tax stuff done when the writing is finally zipping along.
by toni mcgee causey March 24th, 2010 at 10:02 amI’m surprised you can get any writing done with all that’s going on in your life, but as your fan, color me happy it’s going well!!
I got my taxes in last week. Took me all damn day to get the stuff organized.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:56 amIt’s not fair that I am making the most heavenly smelling soap in my kitchen but gagging at the same time – from the occasional whiffs courtesy of the current plumbing “situation” in the basement!
by Erin Nelson March 24th, 2010 at 10:02 amErin, I can’t imagine that anything in your house smells less than heavenly.
For those of you who don’t know, Erin runs Irish Twins Soap company, which makes handmade soaps that are to DIE for, I keep a bar of Honey Almond Oatmeal by my desk just to sniff it…mmm….
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:58 amIt’s not fair that the DH lost 11 pounds in the past week and I “found” 5 of them. We’re on the same diet, dammit!
It’s not fair that I have all new office furniture and new space to put it in but I don’t have cable or phone lines for computer hookup (and can’t get them for another month or so!)
by Silver James March 24th, 2010 at 10:18 amSame thing is going on in my house, Silver. Hubby seems to be losing faster and he eats more than me, but we are sticking to the same lifestyle change, so I’m happy he’s not eating pizza and I’m not…
Congrats on the new office stuff, but boo on not being able to be hooked up to the cyber world for a while yet
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 10:59 amIt’s not fair that I can’t use my brand new eyeliner because my daughter “borrowed” it and infected it and now I have pink-eye!
by Terri Molina March 24th, 2010 at 10:34 amIt’s not fair my husband and I went on a diet the last week of December and he dropped thirty pounds and four sizes and I only dropped 18 and 2 sizes…and you can’t even tell.
It so totally NOT FAIR that two weeks after I get my hair colored my grey roots return more grey than they were before I colored!
Terry, girl, 18 pounds is NOTHING to sneeze at, good for you!!!
I never ever let my girls borrow my makeup. I’m mean that way
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:00 amThanks Lori, but considering I had about 75lbs to lose, the 18 isn’t as great as I’d hoped.
by Terri Molina March 24th, 2010 at 12:47 pmAnd, I didn’t let my daughter borrow my eyeliner..she took it when I wasn’t looking. >:-/
I still think it’s great and you should be proud of yourself!
My daughters steal nail polish remover. Ugh.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:32 pmIt’s not fair that hubby is out in the clinic for another 24hour shift and this in the last three days because another doc got sick and no other of his colleagues wanted to take that shift… So I am alone tonight… again…. whääääää
(
by Sabine March 24th, 2010 at 10:42 amSad beans, Sabine, but…it’s a perfect opportunity to curl up with a good book, eh?
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:01 amExactly and that I’ve done last night so it wasn’t too bad to be alone…
by Sabine March 25th, 2010 at 3:34 amLori, your “unfair list” is hilarious!!
And I share so many of them. Silver – been there.
totally unfair that at the age of 46 i finally have a snappy comeback for every rude thing ever said to me before i turned 40
by Sophie Littlefield March 24th, 2010 at 10:44 amThanks Sophie, I could’ve kept going, but I didn’t want to come across as a whiner
That’s one thing I love about being a writer, I have time to go back and insert those snappy comebacks after the fact – unlike real life where there are no edits
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:02 amIt’s not fair that I had to leave SD, the greatest state in the US, to move to nowhereville, NM!
by Kathy B March 24th, 2010 at 11:16 amI’m sorry too, Kathy
and it sucks that your hubby was deployed shortly after your move. So yeah, you can whine
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:57 amIt’s unfair that gravity takes over just about the time the chicks are ready to fly the coop
by Sherri Bergschneider March 24th, 2010 at 11:33 amThat’s true, Sherri, but I’d rather be sagging than go through high school again. Shudder.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:59 amIt’s not fair that I had to go to college to get this job, and now I have to keep this job to pay off that college, especially when I just want to be a *kept woman.*
Terri in CA
“I have a Marine, and I’m not afraid to use him!”
by Terri March 24th, 2010 at 11:36 amBut you do have that your own personal marine thing going for you, Terri
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 11:58 amIt’s not fair that I’m ready to wear sandals and then it snows.
by Jody March 24th, 2010 at 12:03 pmHey, Jody, it doesn’t stop my daughters from wearing flip flops…in the snow…sigh.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:32 pmIt’s not fair…… That I just bought a new/used car and I have had to put over $3,000 into it after I bought it.
by Angela Carr March 24th, 2010 at 1:10 pmAngela, isn’t that the way it goes?
I paid off my car last month and guess what? The windshield is seriously cracked now.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:33 pmIt’s not fair that…
by GSM March 24th, 2010 at 1:25 pmWe can’t wear white shoes until after Easter.
TV commercials are always louder than the program.
Sports arenas have (or seem to have) more restroom space for men than women.
Chocolate has so many calories, when everyone knows it’s good for your mental health.
My favorite authors don’t write fast enough, but my TBR pile is still huge!
Fun topic, Lori. Thanks for letting us vent today.
Authors hear that a lot — write faster, but it’s better than the alternative
My doctor swears I should have a piece of dark chocolate and a glass of red wine everyday. Damn. Do I love my doctor!
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:34 pmit’s not fair that hardworking positive gene pools are attracted to slacker gene pools.
by Karin Tabke March 24th, 2010 at 1:26 pmAmen, sister. And hopefully we’ll stay past the voodoo doll stage
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:35 pmIt’s not fair that I have to go to a %#&@ business dinner on my wedding anniversary.
by Laura Griffin March 24th, 2010 at 1:48 pmCan you parlay that into an even nicer celebration at a later date?
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 2:36 pm*whine* It’s not fair that I have a fever and am generally exhausted. It’s also not fair that the fever will be gone by morning (like it was this morning), forcing me to get up and go about my routine as usual, instead of staying in bed and sleeping all day as I’d really prefer to do.
by ms bookjunkie March 24th, 2010 at 2:37 pmFever is not something to mess around with, so I feel for you and hope things improve.
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 3:19 pmIt’s not fair that the person I feel like is not the one I see in the mirror each morning.
It’s not fair that when my writing is in the zone my elbows start hurting.
It’s not fair that my children keep getting older and making me feel older too.
by Jill James March 24th, 2010 at 2:53 pmJill, the funny thing is, I asked my 100 year old grandma how old she feels inside…and she said, “Not nearly as old as I look.”
Love that woman.
Chocolate will help the elbows
by Lori Armstrong March 24th, 2010 at 3:20 pmLori, fun blog!
It’s not fair that chocolate has calories!
It’s not fair that I work out and don’t lose weight.
It’s not fair that I am not as talented and fast as my friends.
It’s not fair that I don’t have a dog!!!!
Okay, I had my fun for the day
by Jen Lyon March 24th, 2010 at 4:02 pmAh, Jen, I could just say ditto to every one of your points. Sigh.
Except for the dog part, I’m happily pet free, much to the kiddos dismay
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:13 amLori
This blog is just too much fun to read!!
It’s not fair that at 44, my 15yo niece has bigger boobs than me!!!!
It’s not fair that I want to run for exercise and now can’t due to injury
Have a great week, thanx for the fun reading!!!
Catherine
by Catherine March 24th, 2010 at 6:11 pmCatherine,
I know, my 17 year old is built way better than her old mama — sorry you can’t run, especially if you enjoy it. Running and me? Not so much
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:14 amIt’s not fair to be as Nearsighted as I am and still have to have “readers” since I passed 40. What is up with that…. LOL
by Jeanine Lesperance March 24th, 2010 at 7:14 pmUgh, Jeanine, I did a whole post last week on First Offenders about needing bifocals, which yes, has come to pass, but I haven’t picked up my new glasses from the eye place yet. Sigh.
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:15 amIt’s not fair… that I missed out on Samoas Girl Scout cookies this year. I didn’t see a single table :-{
by Lori March 24th, 2010 at 10:05 pmLori,
I’ve never had those Girl Scout cookies…are they good?
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:16 amThey are, hands down, the best GS cookie EVER! And they’re now called Caramel Delights, BTW. Yum!
by Laura Griffin March 25th, 2010 at 11:19 amI think I must’ve scared off Girl Scouts cause they never come around.
Sigh. I know you can buy cookies on line these days, but I don’t need that temptation…
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 6:35 pmIt’s not fair that I am NOT smarter than my gifted 5th grader and cannot help him with his homework…..
by Sharmi March 24th, 2010 at 10:15 pmIt’s not fair that tripping and skinning your knee when you are thirtysomething hurts WAY more than tripping and skinning your knee in your twenties….
It’s not fair that I tripped and skinned my knee taking out the trash at my apartment complex at the same moment a hot guy drove up to take his out…..
Sharmi,
Sometimes I watch that “Are you smarter than a 5th grader” so I know what you mean.
Too bad the hot guy didn’t get out and help you to your feet. Has the makings of a great romance novel plot
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:17 amIt’s not fair that I once thought granny panties were only for MY MOTHER…
It’s not fair that the thing I used to call “The-Over-The-Shoulder-Boulder-Holder” on old saggy-boobed women now dons my own saggy-boobs!
It’s not fair when the guys you look at no longer look at you!
It’s not when your short shorts now resided just above your knees not just below your butt cheeks!!
And it’s not fair when Victoria’s Secret really should remain a secret when you’re wearing them!!!
UUUGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!
by Lisa G March 24th, 2010 at 10:40 pmLisa,
I think it’s funny guys check out my daughters more often than me…
And granny panties do have a certain comfort factor, don’t they?
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:19 amIts not fair there are only 24 hours in a day and 8 of those i spend sleeping the rest are devidedbetween everything up andddd i have over 300 books to read and i cant just pick one
Its not fair when i wa scolloringw ithmy niece and i doooo loveto color! but our crayons broke and now we have to buy new ones
ok i really suck at these lol
by Beverly G March 25th, 2010 at 12:01 amBeverly, I loved to color with my kids, it was one of my favorite things to do with them. I bought them the 96 box of colors and it lasted way longer than I thought it would.
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:21 amits not fair taht victoriasecrets secrets arent so secret any more and they r only made for barbie i want it to be made for i dont know ME im not stick im what my momma calls plesently thick and i wanna be hot in soemthin too sure for an extra 50 dollars
by Beverly G March 25th, 2010 at 12:03 amI avoid Victoria’s Secret. I love that Gretchen Wilson line — she buys her lingerie at Wal-Mart half price
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 9:39 amIt’s not fair that my hubby decided on a lifestyle change (a diet for those of you who are wondering) we eat the same things ride the bike the same distance and I have gained three pounds since december and he has lost 45 pounds in the same amount of time. How does that happen? It is not fair that me and a friend started college at the same time, both taking a two year program, she had to take two prep classes , while I didn’t have to take any and yet she is going to graduate three months before me when we should have graduated at the same time.
by Nikki Cooley March 25th, 2010 at 2:39 amNikki,
Three months for college in the whole scheme of things isn’t bad…
And doesn’t it suck how much faster men lose weight?
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:20 amYou know what’s not fair? Olive Garden commercials when I’m trying really hard to watch what I eat. All the cheesy, gooey, greasy, saucy goodness right there in front of me. Those bastidges. ;o)
by B.E. Sanderson March 25th, 2010 at 7:35 amI know, I saw an ad for lasagne last night and drooled on myself, thinking about how long it’d been since I’d it!
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 8:22 amIt’s not fair when all you want to do is write and instead you have a ‘to-do’ list a mile long!
by Sarah Grimm March 25th, 2010 at 9:21 amI hear ya there, Sarah, I had stuff to do last week I couldn’t put off any longer!
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 9:37 amITS NOT FAIR THAT I HAVE TO WAIT SO LONG FOR YOUR NEXT BOOK TO COME OUT !
by REGINA ROSS March 25th, 2010 at 9:23 amAw, Regina, your comment made my whole day
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 9:37 amI posted already, but just thought of this one as I was starting a load of laundry.
It’s not fair that after cleaning all day the house is trashed within one hour of the kids getting home.
by Sarah Grimm March 25th, 2010 at 9:31 amWhen college girl came home last week, she exploded with stuff everywhere.
I was sad to see *her* leave, but happy her piles of stuff was gone
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 9:38 amSarah, I’m with you. Hours of cleaning can be undone within seconds. *sigh*
It is also unfair that these kids have energy to spare, while I’m dragging! And I just read some report that said that women now need to exercise an hour a day to not gain weight (apparently the old recommendation was a half-hour a day)–sheesh!
by Fedora March 25th, 2010 at 5:57 pmI’m pretending I didn’t read that “one hour of exercise” comment, Fedora.
See? Denial works well for me
by Lori Armstrong March 25th, 2010 at 6:34 pmI agree there i wonder wher emostkids get all taht energy since seems they do more in an hour playing then most of us do all day one of myneices is 2 and i tell ya she is hillarious but sooo fuklll of energy i get an hour or more when shes around of excersize
by Beverly G March 26th, 2010 at 2:54 amThat’s why kids who move can eat anything and not get fat!
by Lori Armstrong March 26th, 2010 at 3:39 pmYep, me, too… And some people say it’s just a river in Egypt…
by Fedora March 26th, 2010 at 8:18 pmIt’s not fair that I can’t find a McKay Cowboy here in KY!
by Heather Jackson March 25th, 2010 at 9:40 pmThat’s because they’re born and bred Wyomin’ boys, Heather
by Lori Armstrong March 26th, 2010 at 8:21 amIt’s no fair that I can easily put on 10 lbs in a week, yet it takes more than a few months to get it back off!
by Susan R March 26th, 2010 at 7:41 amSusan, what’s worse is when you’ve been faithful to the “lifestyle change” and you don’t drop a single pound.
by Lori Armstrong March 26th, 2010 at 8:21 amYou are right it is so not fair for FACEBOOK to do that to you. Don’t they realize how many of us are waiting for Raising Kane and you simply don’t have the time to deal with these types of frustrations when you should be writing..LOL! HUGS and hope it all works out soon!
by Sharon March 26th, 2010 at 12:06 pmSharon, they reinstated me today, so it’s all good.
So far. But if you got deleted as my friend, then reapply on the Lorelei James Fan page, which is still so bizarre to me…
by Lori Armstrong March 26th, 2010 at 3:38 pmfunny stuff
by kh March 28th, 2010 at 12:48 amits unfair i don have a cell phone