 | 9 Feb 10 |
When I graduated from UCLA, I did exactly what my parents feared I would do…I pursued an acting career. Through contacts and luck, I had a few miniscule parts on some sit coms, but mostly I spent those lean post-college years going on casting calls and auditions while I scraped by as a waitress, part time model and what we used to call a “Kelly Girl.” The audition I remember most was the last one, when I participated in the unparalleled exercise in humiliation known as a “cattle call.” There, in bathing suits (for a speaking role in an indy film that, as far as I know, had nothing to do with the beach) I lined up with a dozen other hopeful, hungry young actresses while the casting director strode up and down the line like a drill sergeant eyeballing the pathetic recruits on the first day of boot camp. He stopped in front of me, checked out my resume and headshot and, presumably, my, um, eyes, then notched his head toward the door. “Your knees are weird.”
I’m not kidding. My &$*%@& knees? (They are weird, but really, have you ever seen Meryl Streep’s knees? No? Precisely my point.) Anyway, on my way out, I passed a dumpster in the parking lot. There, I hesitated for about a nanosecond, then pitched my portfolio, brushed off my hands, and put my weird knees to work, skipping to my car, a free woman. (Just to close that story: when my roommate came home from work that evening, I was already packing, planning to take off for…somewhere. Anywhere but L.A. She told me the PR firm where she worked was looking for a receptionist, minimum wage, but the offices were really nice and, after all, I did have a degree in communications. So, I took the gig answering phones at Simon/PR. Less than three years later, I moved to Boston to head the New England operations of that firm. It’s fair to say, I *took* to the publicity business. Oh, and my parents were happy.)
I’ve never forgotten that moment of bliss and freedom when I tossed my “book” in the trash. Years later, when I dipped my toes (and nearly drowned) in the equally impossible pursuit of becoming a published author, I was tempted more than once to ditch my dreams in exchange for something more promising and less demoralizing. But I never did, because I burned to write romance novels. With each trip to the metaphorical dumpster, manuscript in one hand, arcane rejection in the other, I would back away, holding hope in my heart and that fire in my soul.
I told this story to a writer friend of mine last week when she called and announced: “It’s quittin’ time.” (Do you know what movie that line is from? A free signed book to someone who does!) She insisted that it was time to stop the madness of trying to get published. She launched a litany of reasons, scooping excuses off the floor like trash and flinging them at me. She can’t find the right voice. She doesn’t write in the “hot” subgenres. The agent she almost got changed her mind at the last minute. Her critique group has worn away her confidence. The conferences cost too much. There’s no money in it even after you sell. The latest rejection made absolutely no sense. This, of course, was the one that brought on the Weird Knees story. But that just made her more sure she was doing the right thing. “I don’t feel the burn anymore, Rocki,” she said to me. “Maybe I never did.”
Oh. Well, maybe it was time to quit. You gotta feel the burn.
But what if she had sold? Would she still have quit? The next day, during one of my many internet searches for anything about the TV show Lost, I found this interview (scroll down to the second video screen). In it, Evangeline Lilly, who plays Kate on Lost, announces that she is quitting acting completely when Lost ends this year.
That’s right, you read correctly. She is walking away from her craft, not just her show and starring role, and not just the small screen in pursuit of the big one. She’s throwing a pretty impressive portfolio in the dumpster, after this pivotal, high profile, starring role (her one and only speaking part ever) is over. Evangeline Lilly is a very talented actor who is long past the rejection stage. She has a recognized name, proven capability, star quality, and is drop dead gorgeous to boot. Why would she quit acting? Why not take a hiatus, check out film opportunities, ride the crest of Lost as long as she possibly can?
Her reason? She isn’t passionate enough about the craft to call herself an actor. She doesn’t feel the burn – at least not enough to endure the negative sides of the business, which, I imagine are there, even if your job includes getting naked with Josh Holloway. Please.)
I sent that link to my friend, along with a note assuring her that sometimes, it’s okay to take a different path. She’s tapping into her creativity by planning an organic garden she’ll start when the snow melts, and there, she may discover a different voice and a new kind of song. Out there in the garden, she might find the passion, and some peace. I hope so.
So let’s talk about it. Have you known writers who have quit, published or not? Have any of you writers ever seriously entertained the thought of walking away? Any readers give up on an elusive dream? How, when, and why did you know that it was quittin’ time? Share a story OR name that movie with the line: “Quittin’ time!” and I’ll send one commenter her choice of any book from my backlist.
Oh, okay. Only because I know you’ll ask: I was Tom Hanks’s video date on Bosom Buddies. The episode, “All You Need Is Love” shows up periodically in reruns and someone always emails me in disbelief! (And if a certain someone – you know who you are – thinks it’s funny to post a link to that moment in TV history, it might be time to quit our friendship.)
© 2010 Roxanne St. Claire. All rights reserved.
Roxanne St. Claire is a bestselling, RITA-Award winning author of twenty-four novels of romance and suspense. For the past several years, she's been writing a popular romantic suspense series called “The Bullet Catchers” for Pocket Star Books, featuring a cadre of bodyguards and security professionals. In 2010, she's launching a new series, "The Guardian Angelinos" focusing on an extended family of renegade crime fighters and investigators based in Boston. The first book in that series, EDGE OF SIGHT, will be released from Grand Central Publishing in November, 2010, with two more scheduled in 2011. In addition to the RITA, her books have won the National Reader’s Choice Award, the Daphne Du Maurier Award, the Maggie Award, the Booksellers Best, the Book Buyers Best, The HOLT Medallion, multiple Awards of Excellence, and Borders “Top Pick” for Romance in 2007.
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Gone With the Wind, of course!
by Karen in Ohio February 9th, 2010 at 8:15 amThe rest of the quote:
“Who says ‘quittin’ time’?”
“I says ‘quittin’ time’.”
“Quittin’ time!”
I had exactly the same endpoint in one of my careers. It had gotten too difficult to do, day in and day out, and I just didn’t have the fire for it anymore.
Evangeline Lilly has been doing the same thing for several years now, right? And that is an intense part. I can see why she’d walk away. She’s probably made a potful of money with it, too. Onward!
by Karen in Ohio February 9th, 2010 at 8:19 amThat didn’t take long. Anyone know who said it?
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 8:17 amIt’s in the opening shot of the movie, and it’s the field hands of Tara, if I remember correctly.
by Karen in Ohio February 9th, 2010 at 8:20 amIt’s Big Sam, I believe, who says, “I’se the foreman at Tara, and I says when it’s quittin’ time.” Beat. “Quittin’ time!”
Sigh for best movie ever.
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 9:19 amGreat post, Roxanne.
There was someone on an eharlequin group last week who said they were done after an ‘R’ on a full that she’d been waiting to hear about for 18 months. I may post a link to this post. I think it would be helpful.
This is a hard business. But, I am fortunate to be part of a very supportive and realistic critique group. We keep each other going.
BTW, is the movie Gone with the Wind? I had one of two choices. . .
Thanks again for the great post.
Abbi
by Abbi Cantrell February 9th, 2010 at 8:18 amOh, man, should’ve written a shorter post!
I don’t know the character’s name but it was the leader for a group of field workers.
by Abbi Cantrell February 9th, 2010 at 8:21 amRocki, your encouragement and your faith in my work is one of the things that kept me from quitting. Thank goodness for good friends who kept me on the path.
by Leigh Duncan February 9th, 2010 at 8:55 amAnd we have THE OFFICER’S GIRL to look forward to because of it! You have the burn, Leigh. You have it. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 9:20 amYou’ve certainly given me food for thought today.
by ArkansasCyndi February 9th, 2010 at 8:58 amI hope that doesn’t mean you are considering quitting, Cyndi. Sometimes you just have to step back from the pursuit of publication and remember that it’s all about the writing. Believe me, even after 20-some books, it’s all about the writing. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 9:21 amHi Rocki,
by Laura Griffin February 9th, 2010 at 9:13 amGreat post! It seems every writer I know has been through so many ups and downs. I truly believe the key to becoming a published author is persistence. Even if someone has that rare easy road to publication, the persistence will be necessary for all the later ups and downs. For me, my persistence comes from my love of writing. I walked away for a few years (between being a newspaper reporter and writing fiction) and really, really missed writing for a living. I can’t imagine doing anything else!
You are so right, Laura. I’ve always said persistence and tenacity are EVERY BIT AS IMPORTANT as talent in this business. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 9:22 amLooks like I’m stuck in moderation right now. . .
by Abbi Cantrell February 9th, 2010 at 9:36 amI think we got you out, Abbie. And thanks for the comments. The true GWTW fans are coming out! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:03 amI hit that “I want to quit” point right before No Mercy sold. I was ready to chuck it all and go back to work, where the paychecks were steady and I knew I could do the job every day (with writing, every day I wonder if I *know* what the hell I’m doing). I stuck it out, but I’ve got friends and former crit partners who didn’t – who’ve found other creative pursuits.
by Lori G. Armstrong February 9th, 2010 at 9:37 amSo glad you didn’t, but the need to breathe without the pain of rejections is easy to understand, isn’t it? xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:04 amRocki, what an amazing post. You never, ever cease to amaze me. Wow! Not until last year did I even once (not since I was 9 years old pounding on the keys of an old Underwood typewriter) consider quitting. But last year I definitely did. Not because I don’t love and burn to write…but because of the whole politics of the business. It was my Colby Agency following that kept me from throwing in the towel and going back to NASA. I knew I owed it to those folks to continue the series. So, here I am…thanks for putting so much of how I felt into words.
by Debra Webb February 9th, 2010 at 9:42 amIf you ever do go back to NASA, can you please let the Powers That Be know that the launch the other night cracked my bedroom window?!? First time in the 14 years we’ve lived here (about 20 miles south of the Space Center) and we’ve been through beaucoup launches.
But you won’t go back to NASA because your fans love you! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:06 amI feel for your friend, Rocki! And I so understand where she’s coming from, since I was there a year ago.
It could be that she was stifling her writing voice to fit in. Perhaps the genre she’s trying to write isn’t her thing and the harder she tries to make it work, the more it doesn’t. Her passion isn’t in it.
Maybe gardening will help her find her passion, but she has to take that first step alone and not give a damn what anyone thinks AND whether or not it will sell.
I did. I’m happier now, and I still might not sell, but I’m telling the stories that I need to tell and I like to think that I’m true to my writing voice.
by Margaret A. Golla February 9th, 2010 at 10:16 amThis.
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:06 amMy dream is to be a published author. I haven’t quit and I’m not going to. Do I have days where I want to toss the book and even the computer into the trash? Sure, but common sense returns. I love to write. I can’t get it out of my system. Even if no one other than my critique partners read my books, I have to remember I’ve accomplished something, writing books I enjoy.
by HollyD February 9th, 2010 at 10:46 amI don’t think it’s common sense…it’s passion. Nothing common or sensible about it! And it sure does get under your skin, doesn’t it? xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:08 amThis was a beautiful post, and there is a truth in there that I think doesn’t get said often enough. One of my dear writing friends often reminds me that “every path is different,” something I have a hard time wrapping my mind around. I always assume other people want what I want, and I wanted to be a writer badly enough to endure some pretty hefty obstacles. But it’s not for everyone.
When I hear about a writer who is stepping down, it usually makes me sad, because I always jump to the conclusion that it’s the end of a dream. You’ve reminded me that it might be the start of another one.
I used to be a serious quilter. I sewed nearly every day, worked for a quilt publisher, showed my quilts, read and wrote on the subject, and challenged myself to learn every technique I could. The day that I decided to be a serious writer, I quit cold turkey. I do miss it sometimes, but writing is what I was meant to do.
My hope is that everyone finds their true passion, the thing that makes them content down to the bones.
by sophie littlefield February 9th, 2010 at 10:59 amIt usually makes me sad to hear about a writer quitting, Sophie, but this is the right path for my friend. I think she’ll be happier, even if we won’t ever get to read her wonderful stories. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:09 amI’d be a huge liar if I said I never thought about quitting. I mean, it’s been six years and I’m not getting any younger. Sometimes, when the rejections get too much I want to crawl in a hole and drag my manuscripts in over the top of me. Still, I think I’d probably cut off my left… umm… elbow before I quit writing.
Thanks for reminding me of that, Roxanne.
by B.E. Sanderson February 9th, 2010 at 11:12 amKeep that elbow and spirit, my friend! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 11:41 amIt’s sad but it sounds like she’s made the right decision for her.
Sometimes along the way, a dream just changes on you, or you realize the dream wasn’t exactly what you thought it was going to be.
It sucks, but this isn’t an easy job and if your heart isn’t in it? That’s got make it ten times harder.
by Shiloh Walker February 9th, 2010 at 11:23 amJust like in our books when the hero’s goals change, it can happen to us, too. Thanks for stopping by, Shiloh! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 12:16 pmIf you’re meant to write, you will be back. If you’re not, you did the right thing. If you come back, you still did the right thing and needed a break. You’ll only know if the voices still talk to you. As for me? I don’t have it in me to quit. I’m always thinking the next big break is around the corner. There have just been many many corners. Especially in this publishing era where everyone is turned upside down and inside out trying to figure out the industry!
by carly phillips February 9th, 2010 at 11:27 amThere would be a lot of unhappy romance readers if you quit, Ms. Carly Phillips. You never know what’s around the next corner and you can only find out by taking the chance and turning it. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 12:18 pmOh yeah so btdt. Almost did! Hit rock bottom in late 2005/early 2006. 2006 was the year that turned everything around for me. I still wonder what I’d be doing now if I HAD quit.
Love the post and the story. I’m always so fascinated by the “trips there”
by Maya Banks February 9th, 2010 at 11:28 amI had to give some thought to btdt. But, eventually, the blonde got it. Your a testiment to not quitting, Maya! Thanks for the comment! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 12:19 pmWhat good friend would EVER post a link to Bosom Buddies and jeopardize a wonderful friendship? Not any friend I know.
I think about quitting often. Every. Single. Day. Every single minute of every single day. For one year now I have been trapped in divorce hell and I can’t focus and concentrate long enough to write out a grocery list much less create a wonderful story. I tried plotting something a few weeks ago and all my characters seemed to be trapped in divorce hell too. Not too romantic, huh? It’s kinda hard to write romance when yours has ended. It’s impossible to write about happily ever after when you’re not sure you’ll ever be happy again. When you see every man as a villain, how can you make one a hero on paper?
But I’m hanging onto a tiny little shred of hope that one day it’ll be over and the creative silence will end and words will just flood out onto the page.
Great post!
by Marilyn February 9th, 2010 at 11:42 amI knew if I didn’t warn THAT GOOD FRIEND, she’d be linking me all over the place. I really don’t care if you post a link – just warn everyone that my cleavage is the size of the Grand Canyon in that clip. Whoa.
Now, listen to me. There’s a lot of hope and humor in divorce. Not when you’re in the middle of it, like you are. But you know it’s there, a gold mine of emotion. When the time is right, you will write. Until then, heal. xoxoxo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 12:22 pmI don’t think I’m passionate enough not to quit — or to quit, for that matter. Mostly, I just don’t care!
That’s kinda sad.
by Barbie February 9th, 2010 at 11:57 amBarbie, you care plenty. You’re just too young to know your passion yet. See me in twenty years – I don’t think you’re a quitter, my darling girl. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 12:23 pmRocki, I love when you do these honest, inspirational posts!
First, I am very sorry for your friend. Sometimes burnout feels like we’ve lost the passion, when the truth is that we just need a break.
I have had my heart broken and thought I’d quit. But then I always came back, not for the lure of being published, but because I love writing. Once published the frustration and politics can destroy our passion if we let it. I’m learning how to protect my passion while dealing with the rest.
by Jen Lyon February 9th, 2010 at 12:35 pmI think you’re right about needing a break, but sometimes the break never ends. And, yes, it’s ever so difficult to keep the passion burning when the day to day business and frustrations mount. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 1:50 pmI’ve had several writer friends talk to me about quitting. A few of them likely will, for very good reasons. Others are just beaten down and need to step off the treadmill for a while. They need to recharge.
I have occasionally entertained dreams of writing on spec more and stepping away from deadlines that focus on timeliness over quality (usually when a deadline is kicking my @ss!), but I can’t imagine never writing again. I’ve wanted to be a writer for as long as I can remember.
You’re absolutely right. Those of us who stay with it through good times and bad do so because we burn to write. And those who walk away are best served finding whatever it is that burns brightly for them. Life is too short to miss out on doing what you love most.
by S. J. Day February 9th, 2010 at 12:46 pmHi Rocki
by Jessica Scott February 9th, 2010 at 12:47 pmGreat post and really, really timely for me. After the nutroll I went through last year with the effort to get published, its a wonder I’ve stuck with it. I’ve never been treated as badly as I was last year and I’m used to Colonels stepping on my neck. And, to be honest, I’m still struggling with fallout from my fiasco last year. Its hard to keep going but I will, simply because I have committed to this path. Sometimes, though a change of course is needed. Sometimes, a break. But, if the army taught me anything, its not to quit (in part because you can’t but that’s another story).
Great post and, like I said, one I needed.
Thanks!
Jess, there will be horrific years and there will be great years…no matter where you are on the publishing spectrum. That is a given. You have so much spirit and passion, I could feel your burn for writing from the moment we “met” on line. I think you’re in for the long haul, so hang in there no matter what you have to face. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 1:52 pmI know that we have all crossed this path at sometime in our lives. After loosing three factory jobs from plant closings , one of those I spent twenty years in. I decide to do something different and went back to school to work in medical office and so far that hasn’t worked out. Now I have some age on me and no one wants to hire me. So I think I need to find a new path in life.
by Quilt Lady February 9th, 2010 at 12:51 pmI think I’ve quit about five billion times. Then about two seconds later, I think… what if? And I’m hooked again.
This business isn’t just about passion or tenacity… it’s also about things we can’t control. I love writing. I’m not terribly fond of the business, but it’s part of it, and I’m used to it. I can’t not write at this point in my life, so I’ve accepted that and I keep pushing hard to get to the next place I need to be.
The thing is, dreams can change. There’s a certain amount of “Oh, don’t quit!” encouragement which is the right thing to do for a friend, and then there’s the important recognition that maybe what would make them happier lies elsewhere, and they need support for that, too. They need to know that they’re loved, no matter if they change dreams. I think what you did for your friend–that love and support–make me love you even more.
by toni mcgee causey February 9th, 2010 at 1:23 pmAwww, Toni. Love you right back. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 1:53 pmFabulous article! I’ve always told people that if you CAN quit writing, you probably should. It just takes so much persistence and can take such a toll that you have to really, REALLY want to continue. And dreams can change! You may pursue one for awhile, then decide your talent and enthusiasm lies in another direction entirely. I think the most important thing is that you HAVE a dream, whatever that dream may be.
by Teresa Medeiros February 9th, 2010 at 1:39 pmTerri – thanks for stopping by! In my original draft of this blog post, I quoted you! I took it out because I wasn’t sure I had the quote correct, but it was taken from your unforgettable keynote speech (*weeps remembering it*) when you talked about all the writers who’ve come and gone just during your time in the industry. I have remembered that so many times, and always think of you and how inspiring that speech was! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 1:56 pmGood post, Rocki–I’m sure your knees are just fine. That was probably God’s way of letting you know your true talents were elsewhere.
Of course, the quote is from “Gone With the Wind.” Great movie and book (sigh). And an interesting choice for this post when you consider that it was the only Margaret Mitchell novel published in her lifetime.
by GSM February 9th, 2010 at 1:54 pmDid she ever try to write another? I don’t know the answer to that, but I’m curious. I know that it took her (or at least folklore says) 10 years to complete GWTW. Surely she must have wanted to quite *sometime* in those ten years. Can you imagine?
I recently watched the movie with my daughter and her best friend. When we got to the “As God is my witness” scene and the music starts and the camera pans back, they looked at me and said, “Wow, that was a really good movie.” Snort! We’re barely halfway through! LOL.
Thanks for stopping by. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 1:59 pmthat is a good story
by kh February 9th, 2010 at 2:05 pma cinderall a story with hilary duff where her boyfierd quit football was t=not his thing but his father’s dream
so he went to princenton university
Cinderella Story is in my top ten favorite movies ever, ever. I cannot resist it. I love Hillary Duff in that movie, and the entire cast of characters. I cry every time he walks off the football field and it starts raining when they kiss! Love. That. Movie. Thanks for commenting! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 2:08 pmDon’t you think that it’s possible to have no more than one or two books in you? Margaret Mitchell is a good example of that, I think. Not everyone has an endless well of imaginary companions!
by Karen in Ohio February 9th, 2010 at 2:47 pmI’ve gotten discouraged a few times and thought about quitting. Then I realize I don’t have a choice; it would be like choosing not to breathe.
by Dina February 9th, 2010 at 3:01 pmMy mom used to always tell me to slow down in my writing! She said I was going to use up all my good ideas on my early books and there would be nothing left for later. Hmmmm…..
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 3:27 pmFab post, Miz St.Claire. Hmmm, have I ever considered quitting this crazy biz? Yep. But writing? Nevah!
Now, I am off to dig up that Bosom Buddies episode! Muwhahahaha! I loved that show!
by Karin Tabke February 9th, 2010 at 3:06 pmGood luck with that search. I’ve never looked for it (I have a video tape somewhere) but someone who commented upthread with the initials MP sent me a link with it once. I think…right, Marilyn?
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 3:43 pmIt’s not online anywhere but I have a file of it on my PC. I had to film the TV screen with my little digital camera to capture it. And FYI, the file’s too big to email to anyone no matter how much money you offer me. LOL!
by Marilyn February 10th, 2010 at 1:27 amGreat post Rocki! I have definitely had times when I’ve considered quitting. I nearly lose my mind with every new book- the people I make up in my head drive me completely nuts, and I’m terrified that this will be the book where the facade falls and I’m revealed as the talentless hack that I am. All that stress, and for what? Barely enough cash to cover my childcare costs. Then there was the stress of trying to sell, which took most of last year, and by the time I was done I was convinced I had no more good ideas left, or at least, not ones that were marketable enough to get me a new deal. Just before I got my last deal, I declared to a table of fellow writers, “If this one doesn’t go, I’m going to say F*** the writing and train for another marathon. At least that’s something I know I can make happen. Getting another deal? That’s a crapshoot.”
by Jami Alden February 9th, 2010 at 3:16 pmApparently the universe wanted to spare my knees, because I’m 75k words into book 1 of a new trilogy, and those people in my head are driving me bats*** all over again.
You know, Jami, sometimes I think selling is a little like getting pregnant after years of infertility. When you are ready to quit (and, in some cases, like mine, when you really do mentally “quit trying”) then, bam, it’s Baby Time.
Congrats on your trilogy and those wonderful characters! And thanks for stopping by!
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 3:45 pmI’ve thought of quitting a few times, but something always stops me. I’ll say I’m going to quit and then some story idea will flood my head and not let me stop.
by Jill James February 9th, 2010 at 4:19 pmThose damn story ideas! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 6:22 pmWow. I had to read the post this morning and again now before I could comment.
I quit every day I didn’t take a proactive step forward in my writing. I loved writing, I could see myself published, but there was always something else more important, something else to do, people to please, books to read, sleep. Writing isn’t an easy business no matter where you are, because unpublished you never know if you’ll be published and published you never know if you’ll be successful, and success? What is it? Definable? Not really. It’s different for everyone.
And then there are all the warts and roadblocks along the way, some easy to navigate, some that take so much time and energy that you don’t know if you’ll be able to get around it.
In a recent episode of HEROES, Sylar and Peter were trapped in Sylar’s mind, and a brick wall surrounded their part of the city. They felt like years passed, but it was only hours. They tried to tear down the wall–they went through the motions, they worked hard–but they didn’t really want what was on the other side–or, rather, Sylar didn’t. Fear stopped him. Once his mind was in the right place, he broke the wall.
We’re all like that in anything that is important to us. Fear holds us back, but fear propels us forward as well.
by Allison Brennan February 9th, 2010 at 5:29 pmThat should be sewn on pillows and sold at Nationals. Well said, A!
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 6:24 pmI like this….
)
by Shiloh Walker February 10th, 2010 at 7:58 amI sold my first two books on one phone call and then couldn’t sell another one for seven years. Along about the fifth year, I knew it was time to quit and did for a short time. Then I got the urge to write again, to do something different. I spent a year writing my first American West historical. When it sold, I could hardly believe it! A few years later, I switched to writing paranormals. If I’d given up completely, I would have had a 2 book career. Instead, my 20th will be out soon. I sure understand the need to walk away. For some of us, it’s a matter of taking the time to regroup and try again.
Great topic, though. We need to be reminded that perserverance pays off for some of us, but that also it’s okay to pursue other passions.
by Alexis Morgan February 9th, 2010 at 5:34 pmAlexis, I didn’t know that backstory on you. So glad you stuck with it! Thanks for stopping by! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 6:24 pmGreat, great post, Rocki.
by Kristen Painter February 9th, 2010 at 5:46 pmThank you, my dear friend. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 6:25 pmYes, I’ve thought of quitting before. I did quit once, just for a while after my then-boyfriend and I met. It wasn’t so much a decision as just something that happened. As I said then, when you have a the real deal, why write about it? But being the true hero he is, that didn’t work for him. He encouraged me to keep writing, to do what I loved. But even now I think of quitting. There have got to be easier ways to make a living. But not a single one I’m as passionate about.
by Alice Anderson February 9th, 2010 at 6:16 pmOh, there are plenty of easier ways to make a living, that’s for sure. Sounds like your boyfriend is a keeper, Alice! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 9th, 2010 at 6:26 pmQuitting? Yep, I’ve thought about it and couldn’t figure out what to fill all that empty space in my head with. I mean the vast reaches that are filled with characters yammering and situations boiling and drama that I hate in my own life.
It would be very empty inside my head. Lonely. Vast aloneness.
Ugh. Really.
Having said that, I think this year will be one of those rethink years we seem to get occasionally just to keep us honest.
You know, rethink story, rethink theme, rethink the market and where I fit. All that fun stuff.
Great post! Bosom Buddies? Really? Cool…
by Bonnie Edwards February 9th, 2010 at 7:10 pmThanks for stopping by, Bonnie! I love the concept of a Rethink Year. I just ended one. Now it’s time to stop thinking and start doing. xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 10:07 amYou’re right. There’s no money in it. There are good reviews and crappy reviews. Waiting to hear from editors and agents is frustrating but my characters would never let me quit.
Great post!
I used to have Big Sam hollering, “Quittin’ time!” on my computer when it shut down.
by Debra Glass February 10th, 2010 at 9:13 amI want Big Sam on my computer yelling Quittin’ time! Or Sawyer, whispering, “What’s next, muchacha?” Heh heh. And, yeah, crappy reviews. Forgot about them. Thanks! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 10:08 amQuitting, yeah, even contemplated cleaning out my office. It was right after I got “kicked off the island” in the American Title II contest.
I thought, hey, I’ve got a great PR business, why do I need the headaches of trying to publish. Done.
That lasted all of 30 min. Because I realized something. Even if I weren’t writing with the aim of making a career of it, was I still going to have voices in my head? Yeah. Was I going to need a way to get them out? Yeah.
So I came up with a list of options. Option # 1 – bore my non-writer friends with endless half-baked story beginnings and bits of random dialogue. Um, yeah. I really like my friends and would rather keep them.
Option # 2 – Pay a therapist once a week to go and blather half-baked plot twists and character ideas to. Humm, that would require a second job to pay for that. Not interested.
Option # 3 – keep writing just to get stuff out of my head. Fine. I’d keep my friends. I wouldn’t need the second job. But then, if I was going to be writing anyway, wasn’t it silly not to send it out? Yes. Hence the full circle and going back to writing.
Funny thing was, after having a publisher go bankrupt three weeks before my print book was to hit the shelves, and having to cancel a book launch scheduled for my birthday and paid speaking gigs, including one at my alma mater, I still needed to write. Even after 20 years of doing this and feeling like I’d been sitting on the fence of almost so long I had a permanent crease in my rear, I still wanted to write.
And I got the multi-book contract with Harlequin about two years later.
The truth is writing isn’t any easier once you have the contract. If you aren’t burning now, if you can go on without writing, then, yeah, maybe you are meant to do something else. Heck, I’ve even thought about acting!
by Theresa Meyers February 10th, 2010 at 9:44 amGreat comment, Theresa! Re: acting. Hope you have the knees for it! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 10:09 amFor the past three or so years I set aside my historical writing to try contemporary women’s fiction type books. I had a lot of interest from both editors and agents, apparently I don’t have a contemporary enough voice to my writing. I thought about quitting, but I love to write. So I’m back to my historicals and fingers crossed for a sale this year. Writing is in my soul.
by Tracey Lyons February 10th, 2010 at 9:59 amHistoricals are hot again, or so it seems. I love “writing is in my soul.” Amen to that, Tracey! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 10:10 amWOW!! I love this post, Rocki! I have to say that we all go through this at one time or another. I did after my husband passed away. I actually walked away from a very good request…why? Because I wasn’t ready. I was grieving and didn’t have the focus/burn/passion in me to keep going. I had to stop and go through the motions of grief. So…in a way I walked away for a short time, but the thing is. I never stopped learning. I never stopped wanting to be a published writers. I just put it on hold to heal…which is what you will be doing Marilyn. I did get my passion back and you will too. It just takes time.
Now, I’m happy again. I’m writing. Sure it still hurts and that will never go away, but life goes on. We have to find that peace within to keep moving forward.
Thanks for the post Rocki!
by Misty Wright February 10th, 2010 at 10:20 amMisty! It seems like a long time since I’ve seen your name on these boards, but maybe I’ve just missed you in passing. So glad to hear you are healing and happy. And writing! I love that, and you! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 12:06 pmAwww…thanks, Rocki! I love you, too. I have to say its been way to long since I have seen you. I’ve been around and will be here more, I promise!
by Misty Wright February 10th, 2010 at 2:32 pmYou’ve hit a collective nerve today, Rocki! I’ve seen links to this post everywhere!
I recently heard the same thing from a friend, btw. It’s a hard business sometimes and it beats the life out of you. I always hope they’ll come back, but you never know what will happen. Maybe they’ll be happier doing something else. *shrug*
I DID quit. For eight long years. After one too many rejections, one too many bad contest scores, I decided I did not have what it takes to make it. I renewed my membership in RWA every year, because I just couldn’t sever that last tie, but I wasn’t trying to get published.
I moved to Europe, went back to school, got a Master’s degree, traveled, wrote whatever I wanted to write, didn’t send a thing out, didn’t enter a single contest, and didn’t try to get an agent.
And then one day, when I was stuck in traffic on Ramstein Air Base in Germany, an idea hit. An idea I wanted to write. It was a slow, agonizing process, but I started trying to write a romance again. Every day, that little bud of hope blossomed a bit more.
I didn’t sell that book, or the next one, but I rediscovered the fun. I moved to Hawaii, joined the local chapter, and got involved again. I didn’t sell, but I knew I was back and wasn’t quitting again.
It took nearly five more years, but I finally got the call. So I’m a firm believer in quitting if it suits you, but also in being open to the idea what you really need is a break. I took an 8 year break — longer than I would have liked, but I can’t complain about the result.
by Lynn Raye Harris February 10th, 2010 at 11:51 amLynn, I like your solution: move to Europe, then Hawaii. I’m all in. So glad you took that break and came back to writing – you are SO talented! xo
by Roxanne St. Claire February 10th, 2010 at 12:08 pmAw, blush.
Thank you! And from one of MY favorite authors (who I discovered while living in Hawaii – you give great beach read!).
by Lynn Raye Harris February 10th, 2010 at 3:06 pmWhat a great post! And I love the quote about every day you don’t do something proactive for your writing you ARE quitting. Need to remember that! And hey, there are days I seriously consider throwing in the towel. I had a successful opera career before I retired. I don’t have anything to prove. And yet, those voices are still there. The stories are still there and I can’t think why they are there except to be told. And maybe I am the only one who will read them, but hey, I like to read! And I LOVE to write, especially when it is going well. So, I’ll keep doing it even on the days I want to quit and go back to quilting on my days off or watching movies all day. And if it’s unrealistic to hope I can be a published historical romance writer so be it. They told me I’d never be a professional opera singer either. Success really is the very best revenge!
by Louisa Cornell February 10th, 2010 at 9:25 pm