 | 2 Jun 09 |
Last week, a good friend of mine received the dreaded R. Rejection. This was a tough one, a book she (and I) felt certain would sell to the line for which it was written. It wasn’t her first manuscript, and I pray it won’t be her last. She has a voice that sings, a style all her own, a passion for storytelling that comes through on every page. And yet, she can’t sell a manuscript.
The blow was deep, and, I thought, fatal. When I asked her if she planned to quit writing, her answer was quick, simple, and unequivocal. “Rejection makes me unhappy, but writing makes me happy. Of course I’m not going to quit.”
Her words resonated. Particularly these days, when I’m between projects, not exactly sure what I want to write next, reading more than I’m writing, thinking more than I’m drafting, wondering more than ever about the future of my stories. And, frankly, I’m not happy. As weeks go by without new characters and new adventures, my well may be filling nicely, but I’ve been feeling…flat. Until my friend put those sentiments into words, I really didn’t understand exactly what was missing. Writing makes me happy. Period. Because it’s my passion.
Passion burns inside you when you spend hours doing the one thing that it feels you were put upon this earth to do, no matter how difficult it is, no matter how thankless, no matter how long and lousy the hours, how low the return on investment, how paltry the chance of getting rich, famous or otherwise recognized. Passion transcends crappy covers and sagging middles and uncooperative storylines and long revision letters and bitterly painful rejections. Oh, it really transcends rejections.
Sure it would be great if everyone can turn their passion into a profession; but that’s not the way of this world. Ask my rejection-weary friend. Whether you get paid for it or not, pursuing your passion changes you, and that is the real glory. So maybe you pursue your passion for the payoff, not the pay.
I learned this lesson at a young age. In fact, I think it’s fair to say passion is one of the very first words I knew. My mother was an amateur stage actress who participated every Lent in a local theater production of the Passion Play. If you’re familiar with the story that originated in Oberammergau, in Bavaria, Germany, then you know this is a religious tale of the life of Christ, and then the lives of early Christians.
In Pittsburgh, “Veronica’s Veil” is the Passion Play production put on by one particular church…which happened to be the one my parents married in, after meeting in stage productions as teenagers, but my romantic heart digresses. The play still draws crowds and fans and quite a bit of press coverage, one hundred years after the curtain rose for the first time. For about forty of those hundred years, my mother played every female part in the production, starting around age seven as an extra and retiring in her fifties, after having held the lead of Veronica for many years.
Every January, when rehearsals began, my mother, generally reserved and non-demonstrative, evolved into a glowing, giddy, thriving woman, alive with her love for the stage. Her eyes sparkled when she said goodbye and left my father in charge, no apology in her voice for stepping out on the brood she normally watched like a hawk. When I came home from school those weeks, I would open the kitchen door and hear her in the living room, running lines by herself, her stage enunciation so distinct and perfect, so different from her usual “mom” voice.
After Ash Wednesday, when the show was in production, she was in a perpetual state of euphoria, laughing more, humming through the most mundane chores, kissing my father a lot (a lot!) and rarely raising her voice at any of her five children. She left for performances carrying a mysterious train case full of talcy-smelling pancake makeup, spidery false eyelashes, shiny costume jewelry, and a dreamy shoulder length hairpiece known as a “fall” (remember those?) and returned a relaxed, content, confident, beautiful woman. Oh, by the way, she never earned a cent from this work, but the payoff, in my opinion, was excellent.
This is what passion does for all of us, and why it is so important to find and nurture your own. My mother probably didn’t realize that by leaving her children for those hours and evenings, she was teaching us life’s greatest lesson: when you pursue something you are passionate about, you’re happier, healthier, an all over more fantastic person. I hope I’m teaching my children that lesson…every time I close the office door to write, and emerge the victor over a particularly tough scene.
So if someone rejects your work, don’t let it silence your voice. Listen to my friend who knows the importance of passion, and learn what I learned from my mother. Pursuing your passion makes you joyous.
For many of us, our passion is writing, but for others, our joy comes from reading, gardening, music, collecting, teaching, scrapbooking, cooking. Let’s talk passion today…what’s yours, how do you tend to it, and how do you hang on to it, even when it seems no one else truly appreciates it?
Oh, and if your passion happens to be bargain shopping and you’ve yet to pick up one of the books in the Bullet Catchers series….all three titles in the latest trilogy — First You Run, Then You Hide, and Now You Die — are being offered for the month of June at a $4.99 price point wherever books are sold. Catch one if you can! They are…passionate!
© 2009, Roxanne St. Claire. All rights reserved.
Roxanne St. Claire is a New York Times bestselling, RITA-Award winning author of nearly thirty novels of romance and suspense. The author of two popular romantic suspense series, The Bullet Catchers and The Guardian Angelinos, Roxanne is hard at work on new books for 2012, which will include the launch of a contemporary series, Barefoot Bay, and her first young adult novel, Don't You Wish, and a brand new stand-alone romantic suspense, Space in His Heart. A five-time RITA nominee, Roxanne's books have won the National Readers Choice Award, the Daphne Du Maurier Award, the Maggie Award, the Booksellers Best, the Book Buyers Best, The HOLT Medallion, multiple Awards of Excellence, and Borders "Top Pick"" for Romance in 2007. She lives in Florida with her husband, two teenagers, and one impossibly cute Australian Terrier named Pepper.
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G’morning, Rocki! I was headed to B&N later today anyway. I love these books but don’t have them in my library. I’m going to rectify that ASAP!
Passion. Wow. My passion has changed through the years. When I was young, it was horses. I rode every day and was convinced I was going to ride for Team USA in the Olympics. Yeah…well…
Then I married and the Only was born three years later. My family and home was my passion. I was a Martha Stewart clone, decorating for every holiday, cooking elaborate dishes. Cheering on the Only in her softball career (then track after her accident and eye surgeries). Yeah…well…
I discovered forensic fire photography quite by accident (a fire down the block, a new camera because of the Only…and the rest is history.) I turned it into a career in the fire service and later law enforcement. On 24-hour call? w00t! Then I got old and….yeah…well…
Retired, the Only almost through with college and to be married in a year, and here I sit at my computer, STILL doing the one thing I have loved all my life–telling stories. Even when no one read them, even through the stack of rejection slips, even through the revision process and now the nail-biting waiting for the release date and the fear I’ll never sell another book… Even with all that, I can’t imagine getting up and doing anything else with my day. writing is my first love and my true love.
by Silver James June 2nd, 2009 at 7:28 amOoooh, I’m on your B&N list! So excited. Let me know if you have any trouble finding them, okay?
You are blessed and wise, Silver, to have so many diverse passions, and to have found ways to pursue them.
I love that you mentioned family and home as a passion – it is something that is shortchanged, I think. I am unabashedly passionate about my kids, their lives, our love. I’ve had a few eyerolls for that over the years, and have taken some teasing for how insanely I love being a mom. Sometimes I defend it by explaining that I endured infertility for years, and consider both my kids to be miracles. But less and less I defend my passion for my kids; it just is who I am.
Forensic fire photography is SO cool. What a great job for hero or heroine – have you used it yet???
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 8:16 amI don’t know how wise, but I have been blessed in my life. For every low there’s been an incredible high.
I do have a book, Rocki – lol – one of the first “real” books I wrote – a suspense with romantic elements. My heroine is a forensic fire photographer and arson investigator who returns to work after an extended maternity leave and upon the death of her fire chief husband in an arson fire. She’s on the trail of the serial arsonist. I never quite knew where to market it so it’s languished on the shelf. Maybe someday, I’ll pull it down and see how bad the writing really is. LOL. I still like the premise, if not the actual execution. *wink*
by Silver James June 2nd, 2009 at 8:53 amThat sounds like a great romantic suspense, Silver. You’ve never submitted it?
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 8:57 amBack then I was so clueless I didn’t even realize there was such a thing as a suspense with romantic elements. It’s not truly a romance because the RML (Romantic Male Lead) and the Heroine don’t really hook up. He wants to, but she’s a new widow. Harlequin didn’t want it – not enough romance and the plot was “too sophisticated.” (Realize, that was twenty years ago.) I did have an agent briefly (for about six months before she decided to be something else – and I was totally clueless about agents, too!). She said she shopped it to St. Martins, but no response. Eventually, if the book sold and worked into a series, the H/RML would have had their HEA. As it was, in the end of SUPREME SACRIFICE, all they got was a Hopeful Ever After.
I haven’t looked at it in years and I’m almost afraid now. LOL I’ve learned so much about the craft in the ensuing years. Maybe after I get an agent (a REAL one this time), I’ll dust it off and see if it’s worth salvaging.
I appreciate the interest. And I now have my first three Bullet Catcher books! I can’t wait to reread them!
by Silver James June 2nd, 2009 at 11:05 amRocki, your story about your mom gave me goose bumps. What a beautiful example.
Someone, I don’t remember who, and I will probably butcher the quote to top it off, once said “Writing is the only thing that, when I’m doing it, I don’t feel like I should be doing something else.”
I just got some news that made me look at my life, and where I’m putting my energy, and I realized that part of what my heart and soul are crying for me to do is spend more time telling stories…even if I have to tell them to myself
.
Writing makes me happy, too.
L-
by Lorena Streeter June 2nd, 2009 at 8:10 amI don’t know what news you got, Lorena, but it does sometimes take a personal earthquake to realize how important our passions are in life. Hope all is well and that you are writing and happy!
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 8:18 amWhen I first started going to my critique group meetings, twice a month for 2-3 hours, I felt guilty as hell. I’m a stay-at-home mom of 5.
Then I realized that the happier I was about my writing, the happier I was every day doing things I’m not fond of: laundry, dishes, helping w/ math homework. A happier mom is a better mom or so I’m told.
by HollyD June 2nd, 2009 at 8:29 amI totally believe that to be true, Holly. Plus you are setting an example for your children, and showing them your time/passion has value. Let go of the guilt. And, while you’re at it, let go of the math homework. Blech.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 8:56 amLife right now is in total upheaval mode. Uncertainty. Stress. And that’s not even my writing, where I’ve made some recent tough career choices.
But when I’m not writing, not only am I not happy–so is my husband, which does little for the stress factor. Truthfully, until he volunteered to be a guest on my blog last week, I didn’t really how the deeply the stress was affecting him.
Writing lightens the mood. Even when the plot hits a brick wall, the characters refuse to talk to each other, or the ‘what if’ questions lead to the wrong answers and I have to rip out scenes and go back to rebuild the foundation, it’s still better than NOT writing.
by Terry Odell June 2nd, 2009 at 9:30 amThe only thing better than happy children is a happy husband. He guest blogged for you??? That’s true love. All I can get my honey to do is cook!
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 9:47 amHe was actually going to blog about what it’s like to live with someone who hears voices, but when he gave me his copy, it turned out to be a totally different subject. And he included pictures and videos.
He might not be much of a cook, but he does the dishes, and accepts “scrounge” as the answer to “What’s for dinner?”
40 years come August (if we survive the stress!)
by Terry Odell June 2nd, 2009 at 9:55 amRocki, love the story about your mom! My passion is my family, writing, reading and then a bit of this and that as it catches my attention. Sometimes we turn our passions into books–like my passionate interest in the Salem Wiitch Hunts and the idea of witches in general
I think it’s great that you are passionate about your kids. i’ve been teased for the same thing, and for being very close to my husband. Don’t defend it, live it!
by Jen Lyon June 2nd, 2009 at 9:40 amI used to live in Boston, Jen, and made many trips to Salem. I love the atmosphere there, the witch tours, and the history – as dark as it is. I can see getting very passionate about it.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 9:50 amAnd I, for one, am eternally grateful witches are your passion, Jen! I love the Wing Slayer Hunter book(s)!
by Silver James June 2nd, 2009 at 11:08 amMmm, I needed to hear this. Thanks for sharing.
by Crystal Posey June 2nd, 2009 at 12:10 pmWow, I really needed to read this today. With so much stuff going on in the day job, buying a house, and well a few other things best left unsaid, I have been pulled away from my writing.
It’s so true, I’m really happy in everything I do when I can come out of my office and tell Science Guy I just finished the scene, or I wrote x amount of words.
He’s great at supporting me. In fact last night he asked me when I thought I was going to finish the chapter I started last week. OMG, last week. Until the past two months, I wrote everyday and so yeah, I needed to read this. Thank you.
by Vicki June 2nd, 2009 at 1:38 pmVicki, there’s something particularly gratifying when a loved one truly understands and encourages your passion. I’m sure you do the same for “Science Guy” – LOL at the nickname.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 2:15 pmYep, he loves music and taking things a part. Thank god he can put them back together again.
I used to add not Bill Nye to the Science Guy part, but figured most people new that now.
I forgot to add I love the part about your mom. Mine was tough on us growing up with rules and being Mrs. Clean, but she also taught us to follow our dreams because they were ours.
And maybe the biggest thing she taught us was the word NO wasn’t a bad thing, nor would it kill you. She always said if you get a no and you want a yes, then figure out what you have to do to make it turn around. Who knew back then when I was a child I’d be learning a huge life lesson for my writing career.
by Vicki June 3rd, 2009 at 5:12 amNo is a really powerful word. Especially in negotiations! LOL.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 3rd, 2009 at 5:18 amLate to the party because I spent my morning getting an MRI on my foot and my afternoon getting a pretty blue cast on said foot.
My father died when I was 18. My mother was only 43. But she had a job (she’d gone to work when I was 10 and the business where my father work closed) and she started developing a network of friends. I contrasted her to another relative who was widowed and had no life outside her marriage. My mother thrived and my other relative dipped into depression. At that point I vowed I would have a life outside my marriage and my children.
I love my children, my DIL and my granddaughter with all my heart. But I haven’t let them define me. I have interests outside the home (writing being one) and friends of all ages and walks of life. I could have given birth to the other 4 gals on the Writing Playground, but I consider them among my dearest friends.
The older I get the more I understand that life’s just too short to NOT be passionate about something. I’m not quite sure writing is at the passion stage for me yet (if my book that’s at Harl/Sil sells, I’m sure that will catapult it to the passion stage) but it does make me happy unless the muse goes AWOL.
Great topic, and I love the story about your mom.
by Marilyn June 2nd, 2009 at 1:47 pmMarilyn – hugs on the blue boot. Your mother was ahead of her time, and a true role model for you. I know you have the passion!
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 2:17 pmI really needed to hear this today. I am passionate about writing. I love how I feel when I’m creating people, and worlds, and adventures. So why do I procrastinate so much before I get started each day? I know I’m going to enjoy it once I get going. Kinda like sex, you know!!!
by Jill James June 2nd, 2009 at 2:01 pmOMG that is so funny and true. It seems like it’s going to be work and you’re *tired* but once the fun starts, the energy (and words) roll. Glad the words rang true for you, Jill.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 2:18 pm>>>>My mother probably didn’t realize that by leaving her children for those hours and evenings, she was teaching us life’s greatest lesson: when you pursue something you are passionate about, you’re happier, healthier, an all over more fantastic person.<<<<
Amen to that, Roxanne! i’m so grateful my mother pursued her twin passions of teaching and politics, and taught me and my siblings by example that loving your work is happiness.
by Alexandra Sokoloff June 2nd, 2009 at 6:31 pmI love my job. I work at a small county library. The pay is bad and we have no benefits. Everyone of us is there because we love what we do. We are lucky enough to have health coverage through our husbands, but forget about retirement. We have lost several great employees because they couldn’t afford to stay. We love books, we love reading, and we love sharing that with as many people as we can. I run children’s programing. I enjoy getting just the right book into the hands of someone who just doesn’t like to read. There are books out there for everyone, it is just a matter of finding the right one. Because we are so small, I work in the adult section too doing the same thing. My husband complains we spend more than I make with what we spend on library projects, but he knows I enjoy it. (He has built half of the bookcases for us.) The most frustrating part is all the great books I’m seeing and not having enough time to read them. Have a great week, everyone.
by Patricia Barraclough June 2nd, 2009 at 6:38 pmPatricia, thank you, thank you, thank you for all you and your colleagues do to get books into people’s hands. Library passion is a GOOD thing!
by Roxanne St. Claire June 2nd, 2009 at 6:40 pmI am *so* in it for the passion. It’s why I write passionate romances!
by Karin Tabke June 2nd, 2009 at 8:36 pmPassionate? I’ll say. Yum.
by Roxanne St. Claire June 3rd, 2009 at 5:20 amIt’s interesting, but I never really, truly discovered my passion until I changed genres. I so wanted to write romance. I love reading it. I love the HEA. I love all the tension and excitement. But after four complete novels and numerous partials I finally admitted defeat. I can’t write romance.
by Margaret A. Golla June 3rd, 2009 at 5:45 amI discovered my passion in a middle grade novel, writing over 3K words a day until it was finished, when I could barely write 100 words a day on my romances.
I found what I was missing.
I just hope that when my baby is polished I can get someone interested in it while I write the second book in the series.
How cool is that, Margaret! I love that it was simply a genre change that helped you find your voice and passion. I adore middle grade novels, and YA. Because I have an 11 y/o, I read a ton of them – just started one called FLIPPED last night that is terrific.
Will you send me some of that 3K words a day fairy dust???
by Roxanne St. Claire June 3rd, 2009 at 7:26 amOf course, writing is my passion (with reading a close second), but the level of passion depends on the day. After a bad rejection, it’s been known to falter, but after cranking out a great scene, it soars. After five years with no agent and no publication, it ain’t easy to maintain any level, but I’m hanging in there. (Sometimes by the skin of my teeth, but I’m still here.)
by B.E. Sanderson June 3rd, 2009 at 8:58 amYou are at THE toughest time, I think. Passed the “learning” stage, well past the euphoria of writing for fun, but still waiting to land on the right desk. That IS what has to happen, and that’s a timing and a patience thing. Also, look up thread. Sometimes trying something completely new and different is the key to breaking out. (And I don’t mean on your face from stress!)
The skin of your teeth is obviously as thick as the rest of your skin, BE. Hang in there, and enjoy the moments when you “soar.” (Love that!)
by Roxanne St. Claire June 3rd, 2009 at 9:59 am