 | 30 Dec 08 |
It’s December 30th, and while that may mean only one day until champagne gets uncorked or two days until you make that resolution list, the date means something entirely different and special to me. Nineteen years ago, on a snowy night in Boston in a candlelit church full of people I love and adore, I glided down the aisle and did the very thing my father always told me I’d better do: I married rich.
Only, in truth, I married Rich. That’s his name, so probably not exactly what my dad meant when he issued that edict. But I’m glad I listened to him. Because I married this particular kind of Rich, I’ve been laughing and feeling loved for almost two decades. 
When I look back on that dreamy night in 1989, it’s not the lovely ceremony I remember or the spectacular dinner at the Ritz Carlton for sixty of our favorite people. It’s not the dress, the gifts, the dances, the champagne, or even the wedding night. My most vivid memory took shape the next day, at a rickety table in the San Juan, Puerto Rico airport, on our layover from Boston to St. Barts. We shared a beer, face to face, punch drunk with exhaustion and giddy with love. I remember gazing into the deep brown eyes of a man I still think is one of the best looking I’ve ever seen, knowing that I would die, just keel right over dead if I had to go through the rest of my life this happy. No one could survive that strain on the heart, that much adrenaline pumping through the veins, that full-body shake-down sensation that is just-married love.
I have, I’m happy to report, survived it. And a lot of other things, too, including his early retirement. Since I have worked from home that same amount of time, Rich and I have basically been in the same house 24/7 for fifteen of our nineteen years, so technically, compared to a normal couple, we’ve been married about thirty-six years. I’ve enjoyed (almost) every one of those many days and years together, laughing first thing in the morning through the last thing at night…because I married Rich.
If you know me at all, you might hate me because know my husband is a talented cook, so I’ve been treated to gourmet meals for the entire nineteen years. He’s also an amazing father who has spent about a zillion hours coaching baseball, navigating the school car line, checking the math homework (don’t even think about bringing that algebra to me, baby), guiding our children through life with unparalleled wisdom and love and patience. They are turning into fantastic people…because I married Rich.
Life throws couples curves, as any married person knows. We’ve been through our share, including losing our home in a hurricane, building another that took sixteen endless, miserable months, job changes, life losses, stock market crashes, miscarriage, open-heart surgery, and, now, the granddaddy of all marital challenges, raising teenagers. Through every tough time, my husband has retained his humor, his affection, and his keen sense of balance. No matter what crisis we have to face, we always get through…because I married Rich.
About eight years ago, when I suggested I might walk away from a successful PR career so that I could spend my days with our kids and my nights on this wild and crazy dream of writing novels, my husband never flinched. He never waved the American Express bill at me with a reminder of my weakness for fine fashion. He never shook his head and explained that very few people ever get published. And he never suggested that romance novels weren’t the stuff of true literature. On the contrary, he assured me we’d be fine and he’d get creative with low cost cooking; he took the statistics of publishing, turned them on their head and said, “Honey, those 99,999 people submitting to the publishers aren’t you!” And as for romance? No, he’d never read one, but he’s read and loved every word I’ve written, even the early, clumsy efforts. And every single time, I kid you not, he puts down the last page of a manuscript, wipes a tear, and pronounces it The Best You’ve Ever Written. When I look at my wall of cover flats, all framed and bearing my name (not his, although when called Mr. St. Claire, he’ll treat you to that Cary Grant smile before he answers), I know I’ve had this rare and wonderful opportunity…because I married Rich.
In retrospect, I realize that my father wasn’t talking about money. He didn’t mean I should marry a rich man. He meant I should marry a man like Rich. A man who guards the cave, cracks me up, cheers me on, makes me think, loves the kids, offers brilliant advice (just ask him) and feeds me like I’m royalty. Is this man perfect? Not by a long shot. But, God knows, neither am I. He’s the glue that holds the pieces of my life together and without him, I would be bored, lost, hungry, and blue. Nineteen years later, I can honestly say that I’m still as happy as that girl in the San Juan airport, still looking into gorgeous brown eyes, still a little giddy about what lies ahead, and still in love…all because I married Rich.
(Honey, I know you’re reading this! Happy Anniversary! I love you!)
PS. My husband would be most unhappy if I dedicated this entire blog to him and didn’t use my slot today to remind readers I have a FREE Bullet Catcher novella that can be downloaded from my site for a limited time. Thanks to my fantastic publisher, Pocket Books, fans (and would-be fans) can catch “You Can Count On Me,” a RITA-nominated novella that first appeared in the anthology I’LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS two years ago. Since the book was holiday-themed, it wasn’t in bookstores for a long time and I’ve had lots of fans of the series mention that they missed it. So if you haven’t read this one, or you’d like to try a Bullet Catcher on for size (trust me, they fit real nice) go to www.roxannestclaire.com and hit “free download” and enjoy!
© 2008 – 2009 Roxanne St. Claire. All rights reserved.
Roxanne St. Claire is a bestselling, RITA-Award winning author of twenty-four novels of romance and suspense. For the past several years, she's been writing a popular romantic suspense series called “The Bullet Catchers” for Pocket Star Books, featuring a cadre of bodyguards and security professionals. In 2010, she's launching a new series, "The Guardian Angelinos" focusing on an extended family of renegade crime fighters and investigators based in Boston. The first book in that series, EDGE OF SIGHT, will be released from Grand Central Publishing in November, 2010, with two more scheduled in 2011. In addition to the RITA, her books have won the National Reader’s Choice Award, the Daphne Du Maurier Award, the Maggie Award, the Booksellers Best, the Book Buyers Best, The HOLT Medallion, multiple Awards of Excellence, and Borders “Top Pick” for Romance in 2007.
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Thanks for sharing a wonderful story! You are truly blessed to have married “Rich” and you did indeed, in every sense of the word. What an inspiration!
by Lauren December 30th, 2008 at 5:46 amWhat an awesome blog! I’m all teary-eyed. And yes, I DO hate you because I HAVE been married for 35 1/2 years and cooked for every damn one of them.
Happy Anniversary to you and your Rich man.
by Marilyn December 30th, 2008 at 5:47 amAs someone else who also married Rich(ie), I can honestly say it’s the best way to go! Congrats on your anniversary and what a great tribute to a fabulous guy.
If only my Rich could cook. *sigh*
by Kristen December 30th, 2008 at 7:12 amWow! What a tribute. You should be a writer
It was touching and sweet and loving. He sounds wonderful – and perfect for you.
Congrats on your anniversary. May there be many many more.
by ArkansasCyndi December 30th, 2008 at 7:26 amHe just read this, got all teary, talked about the San Juan airport day, told me he loved me, all the good stuff in response to this very public display of my affection. Then I suggested he comment on the blog. And he said, “Write it for me.” Hah!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 7:37 amBig congrats! My hubby and I will hit the 19th anniversary in May.
by HollyD December 30th, 2008 at 7:53 amCongrats on that, Holly! Doesn’t it just seem like 19 years zoomed by?
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 11:19 amLovely post, Rocki. You guys are a wonderful couple and I love when Love finds a home.
You did marry well, married Rich, and have become an inspiration to many!
Happy anniversary!
Rachel
by Rachel Hauck December 30th, 2008 at 8:36 amThat’s so sweet! I’ve heard bits and pieces of your remarkable love story before, but never this piece. thank you so much!
by Diana Peterfreund December 30th, 2008 at 8:52 amDiana, so great to hear from you. I know you’re still in that newlywed glow – I hope it lasts for many, many years for you, as well.
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 11:19 amI am, and you reminded me of my own honeymoon moment on layover in San Juan! We still do do that honeymoon glow thing. Now, if only I could get him to cook…
I meant to add earlier that your dress is GORGEOUS! So timeless and classic!
by Diana Peterfreund December 30th, 2008 at 8:37 pmThanks, Diana! I wonder how many couples have swooned in San Juan on their way to a Caribbean honeymoon!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 31st, 2008 at 5:25 amHappy Anniversary Rocki and Rich! What a beautiful love story!
by Jen Lyon December 30th, 2008 at 9:21 amRocki, what a truly blessed woman you are, rich in many, many ways. Much joy to you and your wonderful husband. Happy anniversary, and may you celebrate many, many more to come!
xoxo
by C.L. Wilson December 30th, 2008 at 10:23 amCheryl
Thank you, Cheryl. We are truly, truly blessed!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 1:45 pmHappy Anniversary! Congrats and thanks for sharing your lovely story.
It’s the best to write romance when you have it in your life!
by Laurie C. December 30th, 2008 at 10:28 amLaurie, I think romance writers and readers are, in general, a happily married bunch. Maybe we just know a little more tricks to keep the home fires burning, and we don’t want to lose that HEA! Thanks for stopping by today!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 11:20 amHappy Anniversary to you and Rich. What a wonderful love story and thanks for sharing it with us.
Many more funny and loving moments for both of you in the coming years.
by Vicki December 30th, 2008 at 10:58 amAwesome post, Rocki! Happy Anniversary.
When can I come over for dinner…? *g*
Hugs,
by S.J. Day December 30th, 2008 at 11:09 amSyl
Rocki, what a wonderful love story. I celebrated 20 years this last June in NYC at a Broadway play with my handsome hubby and wonderful son. It was a magical time I will never forget. One, that I was at a Broadway play and Two, that I was able to drag the men along. hahahha
by Amanda December 30th, 2008 at 11:14 amThanks, all. Sylvia, the kitchen is ALWAYS open at my house – follow the smell of sauteed garlic and onions and tell the chef to open some wine, too.
And Amanda congrats on 20 years. Such a milestone. I love Broadway to celebrate it, too.
You’re all so sweet to share the day with us!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 11:18 amRocki & Rich, congratulations! What a wonderful, beautiful testament to enduring love.
I’m so glad I married my guy. It’ll be officially 27 years this March.
by Toni McGee Causey December 30th, 2008 at 11:27 amYou’re lying. What did you get married at 8?
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 12:56 pmLOL. Nah. (Though sometimes it feels like it!)
by Toni McGee Causey December 30th, 2008 at 1:37 pmRocki, what a glowing, truly romantic tribute! Your words give new meaning to “marrying rich…” and keeping the Cinderella/Snow White myth alive. Many happy returns to you and to Rich!
by Priscilla Horn December 30th, 2008 at 11:44 amI wouldn’t go as far as Cinderella. Did the prince snore? But thank you!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 12:59 pmCongratulations on your anniversary, Rocki.
by Lara Santiago December 30th, 2008 at 11:44 amDecember weddings rule!
I didn’t marry a Rich, but after 20 years, I’m still very happy with my “James” version of romance writer’s hero/husband.
Thanks for sharing the awesome love story that is “Rocki and Rich.”
And by the way, you “are” an amazing writer.
Hugs,
L
Thank you, Laura! James is the lucky guy! December weddings….I don’t know. We were married for one day in 1989 and got socked with a killer tax bill for a combined income. It would have saved us thousands to have waited a week!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 12:58 pmHappy anniversary, baby! And I’ll be coming over with Syl for din-din. I’ll bring wine.
by Karin Tabke December 30th, 2008 at 12:07 pmSorry I’m so late. Add my congratulations to the responses. My father always said it was just as easy to fall in love with a rich man, but he accepted my then graduate-student boyfriend. I don’t think the money or the name matter (one daughter did marry a “Rich” but it didn’t last. She’s now happy with an Iain) … And hubby and I are going to be celebrating our 40th in 2009.
Happy Anniversary.
by Terry Odell December 30th, 2008 at 12:53 pmFORTY!? No way! There is just no way. All these child brides. Congrats to you!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 30th, 2008 at 12:58 pmYes Way — hardly a ‘child’ bride. My grandmother had shifted from saying, “Is he a nice Jewish Boy?” to “Is he a nice boy?” before I’d even met my guy. At least I didn’t wait for her to start asking, “Is he a boy?” or ‘Is he breathing?”
by Terry Odell December 30th, 2008 at 1:02 pmRocki, how beautiful! Congratulations to you both. I, too, married a wonderful man who cooks and treats me like a queen. He has always been supportive of my work. Like your Rich, my husband reads every single manuscript and insists there’s not a story out there better. He’s so sweet. This past August we had our 34th anniversary! So, to you and Rich and many, many more wondrous years of life’s adventure.
by Debra Webb December 30th, 2008 at 6:04 pmWonderful, wonderful story. And yes, I do hate you because Rich cooks, but we’ve talked about that before and you’re not willing to share. (I promise, I wouldn’t share the bed, just the kitchen . . . )
Happy Anniversary!
by Allison Brennan December 30th, 2008 at 8:20 pmWow, great story. And he cooks, do you rent him out? Okay, just joking. Bummer.
by Cele December 30th, 2008 at 10:20 pmHuh, I go out of town for one measly day and I come back home to find myself reading a beautiful blog by Rocki . . . a day late.
by Margaret A. Golla December 31st, 2008 at 6:13 am*sigh* I hope you had a wonderful anniversary and here’s wishing you many, many more.
P.S. Let me know your secret for not killing your teens. My kiddo is only 8 and I’ve had to resist strangling her numerous times just in the last day!
I wondered where you were, Margaret! Thanks for the good wishes…the secret for not killing teens. Hmmm. I think this is why God makes them so cute as babies – LOL. Actually, we’ve been pretty lucky so far, but every day is an adventure. I’ve learned more about men by having a teenaged son than in all the dating I did in my teens and twenties! I also think girls are a little tougher. My 11 year old daughter has already launched the drama queen/moodiness ship and I’m ready to sink it.
by Roxanne St. Claire December 31st, 2008 at 7:06 amRocki, what a beautiful tribute to your very special guy. I still remember the twinkle in your eyes and how you just glowed as you told me about him earlier this year. Congratulations to you both on your 19th anniversary. I hope you have many, many, many more loving years ahead of you.
Hugs,
by PJ December 31st, 2008 at 6:20 am~PJ
Thanks, PJ! Are you sure I didn’t have something in my contact lens? Kidding!!
by Roxanne St. Claire December 31st, 2008 at 7:06 amRocki,
What a beautiful, heartwarming tribute to Rich! Congratulations to both of you on your anniversary and may there be many, many more happy years together!
Best wishes,
Catherine
by Catherine Kean December 31st, 2008 at 1:23 pmRocki, Big congrats to you and Rich. I could tell how much you adore him from earlier conversations we have had. I’m so glad you found each other. You both deserve the best!
DH and I had our 29th anniversary in November. It sure doesn’t seem like it could possibly be that long and I love him more each and every year.
God Bless and Have a Happy New Year!
by BookstoreDeb January 1st, 2009 at 7:27 amDeb! How nice of you to stop by! Happy belated anniversary to you, as well. Have a great new year my dear bookselling friend!!
by Roxanne St. Claire January 1st, 2009 at 11:32 amI just saw this and you really made me cry. It’s been almost 4 years since you made that call when I lost the love of my life and it’s a call I will never forget, dear friend. You made my New Years Day, Rock and I’m so happy that you share such a strong love with an incredible man like Rich.
xxoo
by Marilyn January 1st, 2009 at 8:27 amMy dearest Marilyn, I’m so sorry I made you cry. I can’t believe it’s four years for you. You remain an inspiration to me every day, a picture of grace and strength since you lost you dear husband. I know he’s looking down and is so, so proud of you, as all your friends are! xoxoxoxox
by Roxanne St. Claire January 1st, 2009 at 8:33 amWhat a wonderful blog! Sound like you guys are pefect for each other. Happy Belated Anniversary to you and your husband! Congrats making it this far……
Thanks for all the wonderful of writing, that I enjoy reading. And hope to see more to come from your wonderful books.
Also Happy New Year! May the new year bring you lot of joy to come!
by Julia January 1st, 2009 at 1:25 pmRocki, I adore a real love story. You still look like the fairytale bride and he’s definitely a prince of a man. So many things for you to celebrate this time of the year.
by Mary Marvella January 2nd, 2009 at 4:40 pm