Comments on: How much is too much?

By: Economics 101–Need Promotion? Blog. | Murder She Writes

Economics 101–Need Promotion? Blog. | Murder She Writes — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 08:00:50 +0000

[...] Be aware that once you make yourself public, you WILL attract some crazies. (See my blog post from two weeks ago, re: security on the Internet. [...]

By: Nichelle

Nichelle — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 03:35:06 +0000

Weird that there are so many dance moms here, I’m actually a dance teacher!

And, actually I am not a published author but I do author a blog under my own name, so I have some experience with promoting my work online and keeping that separate from family stuff. I think all of your advice was really sound and should be followed – online privacy/security is important for everyone. In fact, as my blog has grown, I’ve been reviewing some of the info I put out there.

It is fortunate that sites like facebook are becoming more sophisticated with their privacy settings. You can choose which photo albums can be seen and by whom. In fact, you can restrict fans to just your basic info (website, publisher info etc.) It is a bit of extra work, but it may be worth it to have a presence on such a huge social networking site. So at least with facebook (and I think other sites will follow suit) I stand by the fact that you could keep fans and friends completely separate. You just have to be mindful of how you’re using certain parts of your profile.

All the best!

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 20:36:33 +0000

Rocki, You’re a dance mom, too? SOOO cool! And SOOOOO expensive. LOL.

Hey Nichelle, you are right about Facebook and some of the other sites, and the way you can keep your stuff private. But as others, WE don’t do that. We can’t. We are trying to promote. But it is a good point.

Deb, it happens to authors ALL the time. I guess it’s why I want to let others know about the dangers.

By: Debra Webb

Debra Webb — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 17:30:00 +0000

Wow! Natalie, what great information. I listened to Lori Foster speak once on her stalker. Very scary business! Most folks don’t realize just how serious a stalker can be until they have one.

By: Nichelle

Nichelle — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 15:45:26 +0000

I think you’re absolutely right to be careful about what you post online. With that said, I just wanted to let you know that with Facebook there are privacy settings that can keep parts of your profile unseen to whomever you choose. Create a friend’s list of people who are not family, close friends, whatever. Then go to your settings, privacy, and choose which parts of your profile that group/list can see and which they cannot. (or if you have more fans than friends, you could probably do it the other way around- whichever is easiest). That way you can still share photos, etc. with friends without worrying about stalkers. When a fan wants to add you, just make sure you add them to that friends list.

Lots of social network sites have settings like this, you just have to know how to look for them. Hope it’s helpful. It is good to see that you and others are being conscientious about internet safety for kids!

By: Roxanne St. Claire

Roxanne St. Claire — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 13:44:13 +0000

What a great and informative post, Natalie. Like you, I have children (and a dancer – can we spell hemorraging cash?) and would love nothing more than to show off their gorgeous selves, but resist the urge. It gets more and more difficult, with my son having a myspace page and my daughter wanting to make one – and they want to link to mine! To them, it’s kind of a thrill that their mom is a “celebrity” (in a teeny-tiny way) but, to me, it’s frightening. It gives me such sympathy for the real celebrities who just want their kids to have a normal life, but they can’t even go get ice cream without a pack of paps following them around.

Thanks for the reminder to be vigilant!

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:40:15 +0000

Karin, you are lucky to have Officer Friendly. And we are all lucky, too!! You guys have helped me a lot. And I so appreciate it.

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:38:22 +0000

Amanda, there are still GOOD parts to being published. I think it just helps to know ALL of the parts.

Jen, thanks! I agree that sometimes the rejection sets them off even more. Scary world.

Allison, I’ve always admired the way you protect your kids, and I was thinking about it when I wrote the post! Very smart.

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:35:55 +0000

Cele, I know you have had your own “stalker” encounters, so I appreciate you listening to my stories and being a shoulder to lean on.

Syl, thanks!

Holly, Zabasearch is indeed frightening. I even put it in one of my books, because it is such an intrusive search engine.

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:32:43 +0000

Carol, you can never be too cautious. I don’t think I’m particularly famous, either. But it sure hasn’t slowed the crazies down.

Thanks, Toni. And I agree about Google. You can find out a lot really quick. Sometimes, that is not necessarily a good thing.

Lee, I totally agree. And the old criminals looking you up thing sent CHILLS up and down my spine.