Our NEXT new MSW author is a great friend of mine, and I can’t WAIT for her to join us. Actually, I can’t wait for ANY of our new authors to join us, because they are ALL incredible. I feel like writing this WHOLE blog post in caps!! But I won’t. That would be entirely too irritating.
So, here we go. All the correct guesses go into a hat for a prize drawing that includes HER books along with some of mine. What a deal, huh?
1. This author makes us ALL look like slackers. She is multi-published and bestselling, and has so much energy she makes me DIZZY. She currently writes for a kajillion publishers… Er, maybe two, but ONE of them is one of MY publishers. We even have the same editor!
2. She’s a real Southern girl, and every time I get around her I start talking with a Southern accent! I even had a few guys at Thrillerfest convinced I was from the South, too. That’s what I get for being a great mimic. And that’s what she gets for having such an irresistible flavorful twang.
3. She has worked at NASA in the Space Shuttle Program. I am JUST flabbergasted by that. I think maybe she was a REAL rocket scientist. Wow. How many people can say that? (Were you? Don’t answer now. Tell us when the contest is over. LOL.)
4. She recently returned home to her birth state.
5. She also spent some time in Maine, researching her newest stories, and she learned to LIKE snow. I think. It’s not easy to like. But even cold, she writes VERY HOT romantic suspense thrillers…. And her books are hard to put down.
Why are we having contests this week? Why are we giving away free books as prizes? Because….
Next week, on October 6th, we are unveiling the Brand New MURDER SHE WRITES BLOG!!! Yay!!!
Okay, yeah, I’m a totally stoked about this. A few years ago, the five of us got together and decided to do a group blog. I’m not sure how long it’s been, maybe three years? In that time, many blogs have come and gone. People lose interest, careers change, conflicts happen…
But Murder She Writes has stayed strong.
Why?
Two reasons. First the five of us get along great and really enjoy working together.
The second reason? Our Blog Readers! You guys keep us alive. You’re the reason that we each try so hard to get our blog up no matter what’s happening in our lives. You all make Murder She Writes feel like a friendly, warm community where readers and writers can hang out.
So here at Murder She Writes, we had a staff meeting and asked, how can we give our readers EVEN MORE? It didn’t take us long to come up with a fabulous idea: We’re redesigning the blog, and we’re adding five more incredible, talented, smart, funny and all around awesome authors to the blog!
Now for the contest. Each day, we will give you five clues to the identity of one of the new bloggers. Today, I’m giving you five hints about the identity of the author I’ll be alternating Mondays with. The prize today will be free books from me and our new, awesome blogger! Just put your guess in the comments. From the CORRECT guesses, we will draw a winner.
So tell all your friends! Spread the word!
Ready? Let’s go! (Here’s a free hint, the blog is called Murder SHE writes, not Murder HE writes.)
Here’s the five clues to the identity of our first new blogger:
1) She learned Russian in the U.S. Army Military Intelligence.
2) In ONLY three years, she’s sold 17 books and several novellas to different publishers. Her first book was sold to Kate Duffy at Kensington Publishing for the Brava imprint.
3) Under a pen name, she has a new series coming out in 2009 from Tor-Forge, called the “Marked” series starring Evangeline Hollis. All three of the 2009 releases have “Eve” in the title.
4) She was a 2007 & 2008 RITA Finalist (Romance Writers of America) in the Best Romance Novella Category.
5) Under yet another pen name, she is writing the “Sapphire” series, starting with IN THE FLESH in June 2009 from Kensington Zebra! This woman is tireless! She’s also smart, funny, nice, and as genuine as they come!
Post your guess in the comments! Check back this weekend when we announce the winners!
That when the economy tightens up so do merchants? Case in point: Hubby and I went out to dinner last night to a little place in town. And though we have issues with some of the items on the menu, we know what we can order not to get upset. So, tonight, I open the menu and I notice the prices have gone up. And this irks me because the place was over-priced to begin with. And, I heard that the grilled chicken sandwich, which has always had full breast now gets half of the breast, 4 oz of meat for a hefty priced sandwich. But I digress. Ok, so, fine, we want to support our local merchants. We order.
I love the house salad and my eyes about popped out of my head when I saw the price was over five bucks! Ok, we’re talking some of that Costco lettuce mix, a couple of walnuts and some gorgonzola cheese. But the dressing is to die for. Fine, I order it. I also ordered the ravioli with prawns. So did hubby.
So la la la, my salad comes and when the server set it down in front of me I actually burst out laughing. It was miniscule. The plate was the size of a saucer. One walnut, I had to dig for the gorgonzola and well, let me just say that in five bites it was gone. I was pissed.
Then the entrée comes. The prawns? Three, and just barely larger then the bay shrimp you get on a shrimp Louie salad. The pasta was undercooked, but despite that, it wasn’t bad.
I had a glass of wine (which was overpriced) that was a decent pour because I specifically asked the server to ask the bartender not to be chintzy with it, because usually the wine pours at this place are lite. Hubby had iced tea.
No dessert or coffee, and the bill came to 61 bucks! We paid it and left. Now the point of all of this is, when I become more discriminating with where and how I spend my hard-earned cash, why are merchants giving me less? Give me more!Make me want to come back and spend my money! Don’t freakin’ rip me off!
I am sick and tired of going to over-priced, small portioned restaurants! I’m tired of having to pay extra for everything and still not being satisfied.
Hubby and I decided we are not going back there, no matter how much we want to give local merchants our business. The restaurant across the street went out of business because the owner overcharged for his food with portions that would not satisfy a flea. And, he never had the air condition on, and it gets really hot where I live. Who wants to go out to dinner and sweat? On top of that, he had the slowest bar in Nor Cal and the service stunk. And he was charging 39 bucks for a half inch thick rib eye. Nope, not gonna pay for it.
I dunno, is just me? Am I expecting too much? I really think these folks need to step it up in the portions, pricing and service plus give me a damn foot massage and not charge me extra.
Sunday night–late–I returned from the Levy Home Entertainment Read This! Author Bus Tour. That’s a mouthful. This was my second time on “the bus” and I can’t decide which trip I liked more! Both the 2006 Kmart tour and the 2008 Meijer tour had great authors and I’ve made good friends on each. This year, I had more people bringing in my backlist to sign, which always makes me happy.
Oh–so I’m really sorry I missed Thursday. I really thought I could get a blog posted Wednesday night, but as it was I went to bed at 1 am and had to wake up at 3 am to leave at 4 am for my 6 am flight. Then, I thought okay, I’ll write a quick blog at the airport but there was a HUGE line, and I barely had time to pick up Starbucks and board my flight. I arrived at 2:30 east coast time . . . but then Brenda Novak and I learned that our baggage was still in Denver and we were in Detroit. Needless to say, blogging was the furthest thing from my mind . . .
And after the orientation and welcome dinner I retired early . . . not to sleep (though the Westin Hotel beds are TOO DIE FOR) . . . but to finish the revisions of SUDDEN DEATH and get them to my editor so they weren’t hanging over my head for the entire bus tour. I was already nearly a week late from when I said I’d have them, and I wanted them DONE. So . . . I wrote until 2 am.
I know I’m going to miss some authors in this post, but that’s not on purpose. I can honestly say that I genuinely liked everyone on the bus. I regret not getting pictures of everyone, so I’m stealing from Roxanne St. Claire and any other blogs I come across . . .
So first, why a bus tour?
Levy is a major distributor of books, primarily mass market, to mass merchandisers and groceries like Walmart, Target and Meijer (which is like Target but bigger with an extensive grocery section.) They do stores big and small and are the primary book distributor in the midwest, though they have many accounts in the west as well. They’re not as big in the NE and the south (the south is pretty dominated by Andersen, which is the big Walmart distributor.) But Levy has about a third of all Walmarts, which as you know is a major venue for mass market books. Many mass market authors will see a huge percentage of their initial print run (like 25-30%) sent to Walmart. So the first reason to participate in the bus tour is to get to know the Levy people (all fabulous) and understand their part of the business. What they do, how they do it, and what unique challenges they face.
One thing I learned–well, I sort of KNEW it, but I didn’t quite understand how it worked practically–was the Plan-o-gram. This is the master list of books that are shelved for an extended period of time. One of the Levy staff who handles some of the Meijer stores explained that when you’re on the Plan-o-gram, your book is replenished when it is sold. So, you sell a copy, they order a copy. This is similar to how traditional bookstores operate as well–some authors are reordered only in their first month or two of release, then the books “sell out.” Others they shelve 1-2 copies at all times, so when one sells, it’s an automatic re-order.
You can see how this is important for authors! The longer you stay on the shelf, the more copies you sell. But to get there, you have to hit a certain sales level. No, I don’t know what it is. Yes, some of my books are on the Plan-o-gram. Remember, though that the books on the Plan-o-gram are dependent on the size of the book displays. I was truly impressed with the large Meijer book section. Twice the size of any Target I’ve been in, and 3-4 times bigger than any Walmart–though I’ve heard that many Walmarts are expanding their book sections. Can’t confirm it, but it would be very nice if it’s in fact true!
In addition to the career benefit of participating on the tour, there’s also the networking benefit. I hesitate to use the word “networking” because it sounds like it’s all business, which it sure ain’t! Being able to sit down and talk to other authors in a business AND social setting–everything from books, covers, kids, careers, past careers, family, future books, and basically anything you can think of . . . well, it’s like being a grown-up. So often, the only time we authors have to be with other authors is at conferences, which we attend once or twice a year, if that. Many authors never attend conference. Or they’re so busy they don’t have time to socialize. Flat out, there’s no one who understands writers except fellow writers. The challenges we face raising family while trying to grow our career. Most of us are women on the tour and in RWA, and professional female writers have unique challenges that only other professional female writers can truly understand. It’s not that it’s a sisterhood and boo! down with men, it’s more knowing that there are people out there with the same fears and struggles you have. Since writing is a very private and isolated occupation–except for Cie and Cat, of course, who write together (and I’ll admit I was getting them confused not so much because they look alike but because their mannerisms are so much alike . . . I marvel at collaborators. My husband once suggested we write a book together. I’d kill him. I know it. I don’t want to go to prison and leave my children without a father and a mother. So it’s best that I write alone.) Anyway, I digress . . .
Private and isolated . . . right! Writers write alone. We live in our heads so much of the time that to come out and play is a joy, even when it involves hard work, getting up to an alarm clock instead of a 4 year old, working long days riding the bus and signing for 1.5 hours in three stores a day. The Levy people fed us well, both box lunches for the bus and nice dinners after our work was done.
THE MELTING POT
Though Kathleen and Renee and Sarah were ALL fabulous and I wouldn’t trade them for anything, I missed Pam Nelson who retired. If only because she’s been in the business for a long, long time (hence, the retirement thing) and always a wealth of knowledge couched in wisdom. Pam if you’re around, we’re all thinking and praying for you and your family!
So now, what you REALLY want to know . . . gossip.
Okay, I’m not a big gossip person. You’d have to get me really drunk and in one of “those moods” to get me talking shit (whoops, can I say potty words on Murder She Writes?) about anyone. Honestly, I don’t remember the bad stuff, an instead focus on the positives. There were a lot of positives on this trip–and not just selling books.
THE GUYS
Yep, there were three MEN on this bus tour. Last time? The only man was our driver DeVar who had a hand clapper and referred to us as, “Oh, Ladies!”
Tom Grace writes thrillers, lives in Michigan, and is an architect by day. Reminding me that if I still had a day job, I wouldn’t be able to write three books a year. Tom is one smart guy–much smarter than me–and I was really lucky to get to know him. Ok, he’s Irish. And he speaks Gaelic. What’s not to like?
Robert Liparulo. He’s everything I expect in a thriller writer. Laid back, smart, funny. I read his 2006 (or 2007, I can’t remember now) novel GERM and he’s fantastic. He has strong characters and great pacing. I was tickled to meet him, especially now that he was a YA series out! Yeah, more books for my kids.
And then there’s Chip St. Clair. At first I wasn’t sure what to make of one of the two non-fiction writers on the bus. Why? Because instantly I felt guilty. Why, you might ask. Because I write crime fiction and he lived through crime. At the age of 22 he learned that his dad was one of America’s Most Wanted. And he turned him in. Chip lived a live on the run and now, settled in Michigan, is a motivational and inspirational speaker on not living the life your parents lived, but making your own path. He relates it to a butterfly, and the metaphor is profound and simple at the same time. I’ve been reading his book and I’m humbled by what he lived through and what he has become. And, on top of it all, he’s a nice guy who’s writing a historical thriller! What’s not to love?
THE GALS
Okay, this post is way too long . . . you don’t need to know anything about the girls. You don’t need to know how we almost crossed the border on a research trip. Or how incredibly smart and surprisingly risque the not-as-demur-as-I-thought Sherry Thomas is! Don’t let her sweet demeanor fool you–you, too, will want to go drinking with Sherry! And really, why Gena Showalter is dressed as Little Red Riding Hood is simply not important . . .
And no one needs to know that Cherry Adair is not only a terrific storyteller, compassionate (which she’ll probably deny, but don’t listen), beautiful, and poised, but studious as well . . . here she is reading Chip’s memoir.
And we certainly can’t talk about Gena and Kresley and how jealous we all were of their love affair. (Okay, I’ll admit, I was jealous of their single digits, and no, there’s nothing dirty about that so get your mind out of the gutter Karin. Geez.) But I’ll spill the beans on something the way-too-savvy and far-too-busy Brenda Novak said, “Wow, Kresley looked so sweet and innocent, like the girl next door . . . ”
Just saying, looks can be deceiving . . . Of course, I’d met the infamous, fabulous, Rita Award winning author before. We wore the same nail polish to the 2007 Ritas (Not Really A Waitress Red.) And I want her computer. Except it’s not a Mac. And no matter what threats she imparted with her eyes, Mac will do it better. Just saying . . . (Yes, I stole this photo from Roxanne St. Claire, who kicks ass and if you haven’t read her latest Bullet Catcher, why not?)
There were 27 authors on this tour, and I can’t do them all justice. Kathryn Caskie is a class act and Sophia Nash is elegant and really does drink tea. I don’t normally read historicals, but I started Sophia’s A DANGEROUS BEAUTY while sitting with her and Chip at one of the Meijers (the one where Mrs. Frushour sent all her students to buy it and read it for extra credit, so Sophia and I were relegated to the proverbial “back of the bus”) and I had to buy it because I had to find out what happened . . . talk about a great opening chapter! (Damn her. Just what I need, to add historicals to my TBR pile . . . ) And Deeanne Gist is a gracious and smart woman who writes American-set historicals. Turn of the century, I believe . . . I bought them for my daughter who loves historicals . . . here Deeanne is with Tom . . .
And Jade Lee brought her masseuse with her. Wow, Beth has hands . . . okay, I wish she were here right now! I’ve been in pain for months. Okay, just for one store . . . but still . . . and Jade/Kathy is down-to-earth and genuine.
I can’t pick a favorite, and I didn’t mention everyone . . . but that doesn’t mean I don’t love them. (Angela Knight–sincere and kind; Jessica Anderson–funny and down to earth; Monica McInenery — all the way from Dublin!!!–gorgeous and sweet and well-dressed; Colleen Coble–sweet and generous and gorgeous in blue; Elizabeth Hoyt–funny and honest and check her out on her featured Romantic Times Q&A this month!; and Leslie Langtry — OMG, I love Leslie and had to buy all her books because if she’s half as witty in print as she is in person. AND she knows how to shoot a gun. No wonder she writes about a family of assassins . . . and Susan Mallery–poised and professional, don’t let her shy demeanor detour you . . . and of course Deborah Raleigh, can’t forget her! Polite, kind, generous. And Jordan Dane! Jordan knows I love her . . . and Jordan is one of a kind. A fantastic writer and a kind heart. I adore her Victoria Rowell was our literary extraordinaire–you know, the writer most likely to get on Oprah. This woman kicks butt, knows how to communicate, and is a natural born leader. Amazing.
But sometimes you meet someone you hope is who you think they are, but fear they might be a bitch. I’m so glad that Kristan Higgins was as funny and genuine and sweet as I pictured her and I’m so happy I got to know her on the bus. And happy she won the Rita (pat myself on the back) . . . And she saved my butt and future career . . . honestly . . . but that’s another story . . .
All in all, I was lucky and humbled to be with such an award winning cast of authors. All that creative talent together reminds me that storytellers will never die, it’s a much needed escape no matter how good–or bad–things are.
THE BEAUTIFUL AND TALENTED ROXANNE ST. CLAIRE . . .
Robert Liparulo and Susan Mallery at their respective corners . . .
CROWDS!!!!
And ME between the gorgeous duo of GENA SHOWALTER and CHERRY ADAIR:
AND, last but not least . . . the PLAYING DEAD book trailer. In case you haven’t seen it . . . if you weren’t already planning on buying this book, would this trailer push you to seek it out? Just curious . . . And remember, it goes on sale Tuesday, September 30th. If you see it before Sunday the 28th (the first day that counts toward the NYT list week), don’t buy it. Ha ha. What do you think? I think my designer did a great job. And I would love if anyone wants to put it on their blog or spread the word . . . R-Day is coming (Release Day) and I’m getting very, very nervous . . .
I really don’t know why I do this to myself….reading stuff about current trends in the publishing business. Every time I do it gives me heartburn. UGH! But . . . as the saying goes– In order to win a war, you have to understand your enemy.
That said, here’s a bit of recon I received this morning….
FROM:
NEW YORK MAGAZINE- NEWS AND FEATURES
THE END The book business as we know it will not be living happily ever after. With sales stagnating, CEO heads rolling, big-name authors playing musical chairs, and Amazon looming as the new boogeyman, publishing might have to look for its future outside the corporate world.
HarperCollins occupies floors 1 through 22 of a giant steel-and-glass box on 53rd Street. But up on 26, the receptionist for a tiny offshoot of the company sits alone, gatekeeper to a few drab rows of empty cubicles. A glass container on a table holds a mysterious pile of bright-yellow lightbulbs.
“Welcome to our temporary home,” says 51-year-old publisher Bob Miller, ushering me into a colleague’s more inviting office. Inside, he and his staffers prepare to impart a cheery message: They’re going to fix publishing!
But first, a horror story. Debbie Stier, Miller’s No. 2 at HarperStudio (as this little imprint is called), has been collecting videos for their blog. “You want to see what happens to books after they go to book heaven?” she asks. On the screen of her MacBook, a giant steel shredder disgorges a ragged mess of paper and cardboard onto a conveyor belt. This is the fate of up to 25 percent of the product churned out by New York’s publishing machine.
Everyone’s eyes widen, as though watching some viral YouTube gross-out. “It’s like Wall-E,” says marketing director Sarah Burningham. “It’s depressing,” Miller adds. They had sent in a Flip camera with a warehouse worker. “You can see our books go through there,” says Stier. “The Crichton, the Ann Patchett.”
Miller recently left Hyperion, which he founded seventeen years ago, to start his own imprint at the urging of HarperCollins’s then-CEO, Jane Friedman. She was replaced in June, but HarperStudio lives on. For all its ambitions, it’s a modest outfit: Miller and three women, two of them in their twenties, hope to publish two books a month starting next May, having convinced 25 authors to forgo big advances in return for half of their books’ eventual profit. The books they’ll be doing aren’t particularly outré—Emeril Lagasse on grilling, 50 Cent is collaborating with The 48 Laws of Power author Robert Greene—but they’re hoping that their process will be revolutionary.
Over the past few weeks, Stier has turned her own Flip camera on friends and colleagues, asking them to hold up those yellow lightbulbs and share their “bright ideas” on publishing. She plays us a few of the clips, including one of a publicist who delivers Stier’s intended punch line, tentatively: “Have fewer authors and sell more books?” But the suggestion that gets the biggest laugh in the office is from Stier’s 12-year-old son, who says, “So maybe you have to turn all the books into movies so nobody has to waste their time.”
“It is a very trying time. I’m kind of down about it myself.” —JONATHAN GALASSI, PRESIDENT OF FARRAR, STRAUS AND GIROUX
The demise of publishing has been predicted since the days of Gutenberg. But for most of the past century—through wars and depressions—the business of books has jogged along at a steady pace. It’s one of the main (some would say only) advantages of working in a “mature” industry: no unsustainable highs, no devastating lows. A stoic calm, peppered with a bit of gallows humor, prevailed in the industry.
Survey New York’s oldest culture industry this season, however, and you won’t find many stoics. What you will find are prophets of doom, Cassandras in blazers and black dresses arguing at elegant lunches over What Is to Be Done. Even best-selling publishers and agents fresh from seven-figure deals worry about what’s coming next. Two, five years from now—who knows? Life moves fast in the waning era of print; publishing doesn’t.
So what’s causing this, exactly—this inchoate dread that’s suddenly turned “choate,” as one insider puts it? The anxiety would be endurable if it was just a function of the late-Bush economy: Sales at the five big publishers were up 0.5 percent in the first half of this year, bookstore sales tanked in June, and a full-year decline is expected. But pretty much every aspect of the business seems to be in turmoil. There’s the floundering of the few remaining semi-independent midsize publishers; the ouster of two powerful CEOs—one who inspired editors and one who at least let them be; the desperate race to evolve into e-book producers; the dire state of Borders, the only real competitor to Barnes & Noble; the feeling that outrageous money is being wasted on mediocre books; and Amazon .com, which many publishers look upon as a power-hungry monster bent on cornering the whole business.
One by one, these would be difficult problems to solve. But as a series of interrelated challenges, they constitute a full-blown crisis—a climate change as unpredictable as it is inevitable. And like global warming, it elicits reactions ranging from denial to Darwinian survivalism to determined stabs at warding off disaster—attempts not to recapture some long-lost era but to harness new, untapped sources of power. That is, if it’s not too late.
Okay, so WHY are we doing this writing thing again?
There’s quite a bit more about the publishing business as it relates to many of the larger houses. If you’ve got the stomach for it, you can check it out here . . .
Last week, I took a little look at “crazy.” Today, I decided to look at “fear.” Hey, themes are good, right? Fear is a strong emotion, universal, and the motivators are different for everybody. What scares one person may not scare another. And sometimes we LIKE to be scared. My friend, whom we shall Tee, LOVES scary movies. She and her son will sit for hours in front of the television and cuddle close, jumping and screaming and waiting as the tension builds. She thrives on it.
Me, not so much. Movies, perhaps because they are visual, can sometimes be JUST TOO HARD for me to watch. I like DVDs, because I can turn it off and pace for a moment, or give my heart time to calm down before the next tense action.
I handle tension and fear while reading the same way. A really good, tense, scene finds my heart pounding, my fingers grasping the book tightly, and me looking over my shoulder JUST in case.
I guess I like my own kind of fear, because I’ve read a lot of Stephen King and Dean Koontz books. Just like my friend Tee has watched a lot of scary movies. I think she owns every one ever made.
Fear is big in the entertainment business. Fear sells. Just ask Master King or Master Koontz. We WANT to be scared to death. We like it.
The question is, why?
Adrenaline junkies? Is that why we like to be scared? The things that we read about, and watch on television and in movies, are often imitations of real life–except for all the blond bimbos who die having sex on the top bunk at summer camp. Come on, watch one of those movies and you will NEVER have sex at camp again. It’s like sending out an invitation, COME KILL ME. I’m a BIMBO and I’m having SEX at summer camp. Or frankly, have sex ANYWHERE when a maniacal killer is on the loose. Why do people have sex when someone is wandering around with a knife, wearing a hockey mask? Sex is not what I’d have on my mind!
But obviously, we like to be scared (and obviously we like sex), because these movies continue to be made and viewed, and books that involve fear (like Koontz’s or King’s, or Deborah LeBlanc’s, or Allison Brennan’s) are guilty pleasures for many.
To me, the scariest things are those things that are real, or could really happen. Tonight, there is a standoff in the little town of Farmington, which is where I based the book WIVES AND SISTERS. It’s a quiet community, without a lot of crime, but this standoff is a familiar one. It started with a domestic situation. And an armed man is holed up in his truck, refusing to surrender. It has been going on since 9 a.m., and it is shaking loose the fear in the small community.
Because it’s real, and it’s happening, and it COULD be a book or a movie. The man’s reasons, other than the fact he is having family issues, are unknown, or at least unknown to the general public. And because he is a part-time firefighter, he knows many of the men who are now trying to end the stand off peacefully. Remember, this is a small community.
I heard about this story, and heard my parents tell me about driving by the scene (they didn’t know it was going on), and it hit home. This could be someone I KNOW. Possibly someone I went to school with. Or someone I’d met in the community.
And that is even more scary than anything. Just what makes a person snap? That question kind of goes back to my “crazy” post, but I think it has relevance here, as well.
I am always wondering when a person is JUST going to snap. That is one of my very biggest fears. It was one of the biggest fears in my marriage, and that was justified. But I always wonder how far you can push a person before they snap and barricade themselves in a truck. How does it happen? Do you know you are headed in that direction before you find yourself there?
So now that I’ve shared one of my biggest fears, what scares you? (And no, Paris Hilton having babies is NOT a good answer. Wait, maybe it is. Try not to use that one.) Just so you know, I am also terrified of heights, claustrophobic, and I have an extreme fear of Walmart. Don’t ask.
I love to people-watch. I suppose most writers do. But we must talk about those Hands Free Ear Things. I see them everywhere. Last week, I was in the grocery store and heard a woman talking to herself.
But, of course, when I moved onto her aisle, I saw that she was actually talking into her earpiece. Her young daughter was wandering around the aisle, and finally, the woman yanked her back to the cart and said, “I’m talking! I can’t concentrate!”
I wanted to yank the plastic doohickey out of her ear and suggest that now she could concentrate…
But that would be wrong. I think.
Anyway, I see people everywhere I go wandering with a blank stare, talking to no one I can see.
I saw a woman in a fast food restaurant the other day who evidently could not manage to dress herself or comb her hair, but she could use the wireless ear device. Interesting.
Cell phones have made rudeness acceptable in our culture. I can’t count the times I’ve seen a customer ignore, or be rude, to the clerk helping them in a store or bank. It makes me uncomfortable. I’ve seen them YELL at the clerk for interrupting them, all the while they are holding up the line.
People think nothing of answering a cell phone during lunch with an old friend. Or even better, I was writing in Starbucks one day waiting for my son to finish up something. I saw a “business meeting” between two women. The one who asked for the business meeting kept answering her cell phone until the other woman got up and walked out. That was too funny!
But I’m sure you all have seen this too. What’s the deal with these people? My husband thinks that cell phones have become a status symbol. Look at me, I’m successful, I’m on a cell phone!
But if that’s true, why don’t truly important people act like this? My brother in law is a neurologist and he’s never rude. He has gotten calls or pages, and he always politely excuses himself and handles it. But he’s never rude.
When I spent time with my editor and agent at the RWA Conference, I never even saw their cell phones. I know they both have and use them, but they didn’t see any need to be on them 24/7.
I have a basic OLD cell phone and don’t much care. But that’s because I’m home most of the time. If I used my cell more, I’d have a better one. But to me, my cell phone is a communication tool and a convenience. I like to have it with me for security—if my car breaks down, I’ll be darned glad I have it. I don’t feel like it’s any kind of status symbol, and when I’m in public situations, I rarely use it.
So I’m wondering, what is the addiction to cell phones about? What is the social status symbol that makes people want to walk around with ear pieces that keeps them always connected? That strikes me as not so much as status symbol, but a severe kind of insecurity. Like the story my son told me about the girl complaining that she never had any fun at parties, but she sat in a corner texting all night instead of talking that the people who were at the party.
By the time y’all read this I’ll be up in the wilds of Lake Tahoe communing with nature. And hopefully not communing with the bear that broke into the house last week and had a little party. Bears abound in the Sierras and if memory serves me correctly a couple of years ago when I was up there with a bunch of girlfriends, there was one that kept me up all night digging for grubs in the tree trunk in the backyard of the house we were staying. The bugger was rude, snorted and grunted and well, he left a mess. I was up on the second floor, but my friend Lee was in the downstairs back bedroom. I would have had visions of Grizzly all night. No thank you.
But that brings me to my blog topic today. Nat gave me the idea with her Crazy blog Tuesday. If you read my comment, you will know that I am very, um, boring? But there is hope! While I might be boring, I am adventurous. In fact while most of my adventures happen in my imagination or to my characters, there are a few that if I had the time, and the money, I’d love to go on.
I would love to go on a Safari. Explore the Galapagos, or canoe down the Amazon and check out the rain forest or zip through the Everglades on one of those airboats, and tag and ID ‘gators. I would LOVE to sail the Caribbean. I would give my right arm to go out on the Northwestern or the Time Bandit and take on Mother Nature. I’d like to ride horseback into Waimea Canyon and with my trusty bow bring down a big bad feral boar then have the locals cook him and have one hell of a luau.
Jumping out of an airplane or bungee jumping off a bridge? No freakin’ way. Acrobatics in an airplane? Nope. Riding 140 + mph with Jr at say, Infineon Raceway? Maybe.
How about you? Are you adventurous? And what would be the ultimate adventure?
(I’ll try to respond today, but it’s my understanding that the house I’m staying at has no Internet. And strangely, I’m good with that. But I’ll be home Saturday.)
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. . . and Jordan is one of a kind. A fantastic writer and a kind heart. I adore her 
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