 | 28 Apr 08 |
Right now I’m reading a book and I want to kill the heroine. She’s a whiner because life has dealt her a bad hand. I’m about 50 pages into this book and I have now thought of three ways to kill this chick.
1) Run her over with hero’s motorcycle. But I am afraid she won’t die then she’ll have something else to whine about. SHUDDER!
2) Have the bird in the story peck her to death. But I’m pretty sure it’d take too long for her to die that way and OMG the whining!
3) Crush her beneath all her law books. With the right planning, I think this one could work—quick death and she’d have the breath instantly knocked out of her, so –BONUS- no whining!
Okay, anyone want to take a guess why this heroine is getting under my skin? Aside from the fact that she’s boring, she’s one of my worst fears.
I know I’ve written a heroine like her. Hopefully not in any of my published books, but in my first couple books, I was the queen of the Whiny Heroine.
Generally, writing those kinds of heroines (or hero) comes from either inexperience or lazy writing. The inexperienced writers haven’t yet learned how to show inner conflict, so instead they make the heroine a whiner with inner dialogue of, “I never fit in, my mother married all these rich guys and sent me to boarding schools, then my dad turned out not to be my dad at all. I can’t even have a relationship with a great guy because…” Just kill me now if I have to read one more word. But you get the idea.
One of the things I still work on is trusting the reader to figure this stuff out from scenes. Give the reader’s scenes with some inner thoughts and dialogue, but most importantly, ACTION. The readers will figure it out!
Readers trust action to define a character. Show a heroine or hero’s inner conflict. In my paranormal, my heroine is afraid of locked spaces.
What do you think I did to her?
Locked her up. And she went ballistic.
I don’t want to tell you more, but you get the idea. I never had to tell the readers she had this fear. I showed it.
In another book, I had a heroine deeply afraid of rejection. She made sure no one could reject her. She used snark and humor to keep people who could hurt her at a distance. I never had to tell the reader she was afraid of rejection. The readers and the hero figured it out together. But another important element of this story is that readers had to believe the heroine COULD have a relationship. So I gave her a close relationship with her brothers. That SHOWED the readers (and the hero) her loving (but still snarky) side. I never had to say she loved her brothers.
Boy this turned into a rant! And I suspect I’m lecturing myself since I am just getting started on revisions for BLOOD MAGIC. My editor pointed out some places where I didn’t show my heroine learning how to be a witch and her joy in doing so. That’s lazy writing and my editor is dead on about this. I have totally cheating the readers so I’ll be working my butt off over the next few weeks practicing what I have preached here!
So tell me what gets under your skin as a reader? And can you think of more ways to kill this whiny heroine?
Award winning author, Jennifer Lyon, always wanted to be a witch. Since her witch-powers never materialized, she went onto Plan B and now she creates magic in her books. In her new series, the author of the acclaimed Samantha Shaw Mystery Series (written as Jennifer Apodaca) introduces the Witch Hunters, legendary men who must overcome a curse to team up with witches and fight evil.
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2) Have the bird in the story peck her to death. But I’m pretty sure it’d take too long for her to die that way and OMG the whining!
This is something I say when I don’t want to do something – I’d rather be pecked to death by ducks! Maybe if she’s pecked to death by birds or ducks they will make so much noise you won’t be able to hear her whine!
by Erin April 28th, 2008 at 7:39 amI’m not sure of a better way to kill her off then you mentioned, but I will remember this lecture and have NO WHINY HEROINES!!
by Amanda April 28th, 2008 at 8:20 amHow are we suppose to believe that a whiny heroine is worth the rescue… could figure out the mystery on her own…and save the world when all the world wants to do is muzzle her? Argh.
as for killing her, it should begin with a muzzle, say super glue her lips accidently together when she breaks a nail and can’t open the glue so she uses her teeth to remove the applicator. Hey, it could happen… alot.
by Cele April 28th, 2008 at 8:25 amLOL on the ways to kill the heroine.
As for me, It’s a toss-up between whiny heroines and heroines who are just plain too stupid to live as the bigger pet peeve in reading. Most of those heroines don’t make it past page ten with me. I don’t mind a heroine who’s been dealt a bad hand, as long as she’s doing something instead of whining about it.
by Amy Addison April 28th, 2008 at 8:45 amErin, Duck Pecked To Death, it has a ring to it!
Amanda, I did sort of lecture, didn’t I? I hate doing that. But I’m glad you got something out of it!
Cele! ROTF… I love supergluing her lips! That’s a great idea! Why aren’t your writing books? You have the best imagination!
Amy, all great points! And who hasn’t been dealt a bad hand at some point in life?
by Jen April 28th, 2008 at 8:54 amWhat bugs me as a reader? When the hero or heroine is never, ever wrong. About anything.
How about having that whiny heroine choke to death on the bug that flies into her mouth when she is once again going on and on and on, whining about something or other. It would have to be a pretty big bug, I guess, but it’d be relatively quick, and even if it isn’t…she’s choking on a bug, so she can’t whine.
by Elaine April 28th, 2008 at 9:36 amCome on, whiny heroines are just true to life. I mean, THINK about all the whiny people you know…..
by Natalie April 28th, 2008 at 10:41 amyour post made me smile, Jen. Whiny heroines? Shoot ‘em.
by Karin April 28th, 2008 at 10:49 amBut Natalie, whiny people exist and we want to shoot them, and it’s very bad to want to shoot the heroine . . .
My biggest pet peeve is being stupid. Any character. They need to be smart, or at least logical FOR THEIR CHARACTER. Anyone who acts out of character immediately throws me out of the story. It’s why I couldn’t buy into Anakin in episode III killing the kids. I could see him going to the dark side, but I couldn’t see this happening–not with Padme pregnant. I’m still pissed off about it. I COULD have bought into it if it had been built up differently, but it was rushed. Now Obi Wan leaving Anakin dying at the lava planet when some people have suggested that he should have killed him, I’d argue that this WAS in Obi Wan’s character. He thought Anakin was going to die, he couldn’t kill an injured man, someone he loved. Totally in character.
by Allison Brennan April 28th, 2008 at 11:58 amElaine, ooh! Good one! The heroine who is never wrong. Sure, we could have a bug fly into her mouth and choke her–works for me.
Natalie, LOL! Too true!
Karin, I’m ready to shoot this heroine. For now, I’ve switched to reading another book.
Allison, you’re right–whiny is heroic. Acting out of character (unless forced to) is another good one.
by Jen April 28th, 2008 at 12:36 pmI am a huge fan of “show”, not “tell”. I can’t stand being “told” a character is ___fill in appropriate adjective here___ when there’s no evidence in that character’s actions to back it up.
I also detest when dialogue sounds nothing like the way real people talk. I read a book recently where a female character told a male character that he had “casual good looks”. What woman talks like that??! =)
by C.J. Redwine April 28th, 2008 at 3:19 pmC.J., oh yeah, dialogue! My pet peeve is when the men talk like girls. Or repeating things in dialogue that we just saw in the scene (which I’m sure I’ve done!)
by Jen Apodaca April 29th, 2008 at 7:13 am