 | 4 Sep 06 |
I shamelessly fling open the bedroom when a scene calls for it.
Why?
I’ve really been thinking about this because I just wrote a sex scene that’s a major turning point in my book. This is the short story for the SUN, SAND AND SEX anthology. This scene was, by far, the hardest to write in my book.
This is the scene where I strip the protective layers away from my characters and put them at their most vulnerable point. Where they both make a decision that will change the direction of their lives. Each of them has to give up a portion of control to trust the other. Their emotions rise to the surface, and they can’t lie to themselves any longer.
That’s what my sex scenes are usually about. Every scene should have layers to it, and sex scenes are no different. If the sex scene isn’t revealing something about the character and moving the plot forward, you might as well be writing porn. It’ll have the same emotional impact.
Lately I read three very graphic novels; a regency, a romantic suspense and a paranormal. All three had graphic language etc.
Two worked for me and one didn’t.
Because I knew I was heading toward a fairly graphic scene in my book, I wanted to understand why. The two that worked kept moving the plot forward and showing me something about the characters. I didn’t feel icky reading the scenes.
The last one, the paranormal, was trying to do the same thing, but it didn’t work as well. Part of it was the way the language was used. It felt like, “Look mom, I know the words! Are you shocked?” Part of it was the heroine pitching a hissy fit when she found out the hero was engaged to be married after they had sex. She didn’t ask him before the sex, in fact, she demanded that she needed sex. (Please…I expect a powerful witch to have self control and to reason out stuff). She did not let the hero explain, but sulked and punished him by withholding sex. It was all soooooo high school girl mentality.
The other two books had heroines who made mistakes, occasionally were unreasonable, but always with proper motivation. And the sex scenes stripped away enough of their protective shields to show me this, and to make me care about them.
In the regency, the hero started out with less than honorable intentions, but his love for the heroine healed his pain. He thought he could be callous and cold, but he couldn’t. He was so very human, with real and valid anger, but he was heroic in never actually acting on that anger. It was such a painful struggle to watch as the reader, and the sex scenes made him more vulnerable than he ever imagined.
Real, interesting, engaging me in more that just body parts.
All this analyzing is good and bad, you know? Because then I worry so much more about my own scenes. I wrote the pivotal sex scene this week and sent if off to a friend because I wanted to make sure I’m writing a scene about my characters, not body parts.
Evidently I passed the test, but as we all know, readers are the final and valid judges!
All this can be done without using sex scenes. I can name many authors who close the door and yet write powerful books. I choose to put sex in mine when I think the scene calls for it. That’s being true to myself as a writer.
I can spot an author trying to write sex who isn’t being true to themselves. Don’t do it. It’s not fair to you and it’s not fair to your readers, or frankly, your characters. They have a story to tell, and it’s up to you to tell it authentically.
Writing hot or not? What are your thoughts as readers or writers?
© 2006 – 2009, Jennifer Lyon. All rights reserved.
Award winning author, Jennifer Lyon, always wanted to be a witch. Since her witch-powers never materialized, she went onto Plan B and now she creates magic in her books. In her new series, the author of the acclaimed Samantha Shaw Mystery Series (written as Jennifer Apodaca) introduces the Witch Hunters, legendary men who must overcome a curse to team up with witches and fight evil.
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I think there’s a saying, “she knew the words, but not the music”.
I’m awful at sex scenes, and fortunately, for the kind of book I write, I don’t have to do them! Yay!
But I have written a few, when I wrote a romantic suspense, and two historical romances. The only thing I could do was go from the character’s point of view, and try to find that internal rhythm – what meant the most to her and how it affected her–feel, scent, taste, emotional pull. I concentrated a lot on getting to that point (one time it was after a rainstorm, removing wet clothing). I find that the most interesting, how you arrive there.
It was always the hardest thing to write, and I worked the most on it–since I’m not a natural–until it felt right to me. That was all I could do! Writing is about being honest, so you have to come from a place of honesty, or else the whole thing will fall apart, no matter what you’re writing about.
That said, I don’t have to write sex scenes! Yay!!!!!
by J. Carson Black September 4th, 2006 at 6:50 amI dont’ tend to read sex scenes. And now maybe I realise why, well besides the fridgid, prude factor in me. I tend to skim over, or even skip the sex scenes, just reading the dialogue, and usually find I didn’t miss anything. But once in a while I will have found myself pulled into the sex scene, not skimming, not blushing, but reading in every single glorious word. Now I understand. Thanks Jennifer.
by Cele September 4th, 2006 at 7:18 amJake, you’re cracking me up! I liked the way you described writing the sex scenes, though. I was just talking to someone about that very thing–writing the scene from the characters POV. That’s true with every scene… Now shall we give three cheers for Jake not having to write the sex scenes? LOL!
Cele, I’m glad I said something helpful! It’s all a matter of personal taste. What works for one reader doesn’t work for another. The only time griping about sex scenes irritates me is when someone buys a book that’s obviously has graphic sex, lets say Laura K Hamilton, then goes on Amazon and rips the author (not the book) apart for the sex. Hello! That’s the author’s choice to write it. The reader’s choice is rather to read it or not. Now if the reviewer says she didn’t care for the sex scenes, or they didn’t work for her, and leaves it at that, it doesn’t annoy me.
by Jen September 4th, 2006 at 7:56 amI think the key to any good writing is bringing it down to the particular. Feelings are universal. We’ve all felt our flesh tighten and get hot in the face when the clerk runs our credit card and it takes a long time – are we over our limit? Even if we aren’t anywhere near our limit?
We can all relate to what it must feel like to walk out of the restaurant with part of our skirt tucked in our pantyhose. (Well, maybe not men—-but some men.)
I think sex is the same thing. The parts that intrigue me about people coming together for the first time in intimacy is what they’re afraid of. Or, conversely, why they can’t stand one more minute without it.
by J. Carson Black September 4th, 2006 at 8:32 amThe first love scene I wrote I had to close and lock the office door. I wrote five pages in 30 minutes. I was all flushed and warm, my heart beating 90 miles an hour. It was actually better written than I thought. I like lots of feelings and emotions. The ‘why’ are we doing this.
by Amanda September 4th, 2006 at 9:05 amJake, very true. You had some great examples!
Amanda, too funny! I hate the idea of someone looking over my shoulder when I’m writing anything, let alone sex!
by Jen September 4th, 2006 at 9:58 amI find I tend to skim the more graphic descriptions and look for the dialog / internal thoughts. I don’t need the description to have a clue what’s going on, and too much starts sounding like an instruction manual… unless the exception to this is someone’s very first time and she’s (or, I guess, “he’s”) clueless as to what the other person is going to do down there and then, oh! Okay. That works.
But it’s got to be as much about them crossing some sort of line of trust or acceptance or something rather than just the act.
by toni mcgee causey September 4th, 2006 at 10:15 am“Crossing some sort of line of trust or acceptance”… I like that, Toni!
by J. Carson Black September 4th, 2006 at 11:01 amI write sex scenes and love scenes. Both require some form of an emotional hook for both parties to be involved. In a sex scene it can be curiosity, anger, frustration or unmitigated lust the two have for each other. For me as a writer for that to happen there also has to be more for my characters, more in that I know something they don’t know or more importantly more they are in denial about. But there must also be a strong pull lurking beneath.
by Karin September 4th, 2006 at 11:47 amWhile my heroes admittedly will pursue a woman they find attractive and have sex for the sake of sex, my heroines don’t. Sex for them is more than a physical connection. For my girls sex has to mean something more than scratching an itch. I’m not so old fashioned that the sex has to come with roses and a promise of marriage, but my girls have the say in who, where and when. It’s on their terms. That’s not so say they don’t get into some heavy foreplay, but the ultimate act is because they want it, because they have an emotional investment.
The sex scene is just the beginning for them both. Ultimately they come together emotionally and physically in the love scene.
Obviously since I write erotic suspense or a form there of I have to be more explicit. I don’t mind using all of the words, but they do get tiresome after awhile.
Toni, it would be fun to read a scene where the guy is clueless as to what’s going on
Like Jake, I like your description of “…crossing some sort of line of trust or acceptance or something rather than just the act.”
Karin, that’s exactly the word–tiresome. It’s only effective if it’s really the character’s words
by Jen September 4th, 2006 at 2:23 pmI like a good sex/love scene.
But there needs to be something to set it apart for me. It needs to charge the plot, set something up, open a can of worms. It needs to have some purpose. I also want emotion in it. Honest to god emotion. Not just simple basic instinct and lust– but some sort of feeling that sets this person apart. That makes the moment special. I guess that’s the romantic in me.
To be honest, I find most love scenes boring anymore. I’ll read the first one in a book and if it isn’t different/evocative/something I’ll skip the rest. I’ve read too many that are universal, you can take the hero/heroine out from book and and switch them with book B– and other than the names the scene would still make sense. I think part of the reason I’m being drawn more and more to maintream RS is because the love scenes are scarce. Which is a good clue that I’m moving away from the traditional RS.
by Theresa September 4th, 2006 at 3:52 pmI include sex scenes and some are better than others. For me it’s not the writing the scene as much as finding an appropriate place for them to HAVE sex. I think THE PREY had a realistic and graphic sex scene that wasn’t gratuitous where we learned a lot about both the hero and the heroine. THE HUNT had a very non-graphic love scene that was far more emotional and probably the hardest for me to write, though I think it worked the best. THE KILL didn’t have to be there, I’m the first to admit, though the place of the scenes were appropriate for the story (after they rescued a victim but before the killer was caught.)
It’s funny but finding a place in SPEAK NO EVIL wasn’t difficult because it fit the CHARACTERS more than anything else. It seemed far more comfortable and realistic and it’s near the end of the book, but before the climax. It’s a quieter love story than SEE NO EVIL which has far more sexual tension.
It’s really interesting to me how the books come out in the end. I think I write pretty “traditional” RS which for me focuses on the suspense and has one or two appropriate-to-the-character love scenes.
I’ve had some readers say they loved my books, but wanted no sex scenes; others that wanted more sex scenes but less violence. Under the heading: can’t please everyone . . .
by Allison September 4th, 2006 at 4:54 pmAllison, I thought yours were great, and in the right place. (I’m working on that same issue now in book 2; there is definitely going to be at least one hot sex scene… I just have to figure out where and how to keep it in character. I’m certain something is going to blow up or catch on fire.)
Karin, yours worked extremely well in Hard Bodies; not only were they very well-written, but they were the point of the contention — it was an issue that couple had to work out due to their past (without giving away too much here, I hope). I felt like they were each in their own private jail, emotionally, and until they were confronted with the other person and broke through those barriers to be with each other, they weren’t going to ever be able to have the kind of life / love they both craved.
Um, you know, I went back and looked at some books and realized I actually read all of those scenes when they’re done well… it’s the ones which seem out-of-character or more tab-A inserts in slot-B which gets boring. That doesn’t seem to be a problem with the great writers in this group.
by toni mcgee causey September 4th, 2006 at 7:00 pm
Thanks, Toni. I loved writing those two battling all the way to bed.
by Karin September 4th, 2006 at 8:00 pmTheresa, I’m with you on boring love scenes. In RS, it just depends for me. A RS I recently read was very graphic, but the scenes played into the hero and heroine’s emotional issues. The heroine’s issues were directly from the suspense plot so it all worked.
Allison, particularly in RS, finding the right place for sex scenes is important, otherwise it’ll drive the reader crazy thinking NOW? There’s a killer at the front door and you’re doing it NOW!! Of course, you know that already!
Hey Toni, tab A into tab B is best left to sex ed
by Jen September 5th, 2006 at 6:51 amBecause I write suspense and mystery, the sex thing isn’t as big an issue. For example, in W&S there isn’t much sex at all, because it didn’t have a lot to do with the story. But BCD DOES have a sex scene, because it was pivotal to the character’s development and her decision to finally LIVE HER LIFE. In the book I just finished, there is a lot more sex, but again, it’s about a woman grieving something lost and starting over.
It all winds down to something my rather prudish younger sister said to me once.
“Why do you have to write about sex anyway?”
My answer: “Why do you have to HAVE it?”
That’s life, people. Most people don’t go through it celibate. LOL.
by Natalie September 5th, 2006 at 6:51 amNatalie, what was your sister’s answer????
It seems like everyone is saying the same thing–if sex fits, do it
by Jen September 5th, 2006 at 6:55 amThanks Toni (whew) and I can hardly wait to check out your sex scene, it should be the most fun of any I’ve read!
BTW, gang, I got to read an advance copy of Toni’s book and I’m almost as excited as she is about its release . . . it is fabulous.
by Allison September 5th, 2006 at 9:51 am